#“the worst person you know made a great point” oh yeah

[glitter-stained]

Jean Paul Sartre kinda hilarious ngl, dedicated to talk shit about Freud in perhaps the only way that's dumber than Freud himself, then had the balls to write a wildly incorrect scenario for his biography movie and be confused they wouldn't use that scenario for the movie script like I'm so confused what's going on here bro didn't you hate that guy

[moonstruckme]

hello mae baby please may you write a fic with anyone u like with a reader who is really drunk and the other person is taking care of her and she thinks she is annoying and they ar like why would u think that i love looking after u and some tenderness maybe with mauruaders but actually with whoever you’d like mae u are so nice and lovely and kind bye bye’!!!!

Hi lovely, thank you so much for requesting!

cw: alcohol

Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 1.3k words

You know Remus is reading when you get home, because he doesn’t call for you and you are not quiet as you come inside. You drop your keys while trying to hang them on the hook, your bag bounces off the chair you toss it onto and falls noisily onto the floor, and your body lists as you walk towards your bedroom so that you bump your shoulder into the wall not once but twice. Your entry is a series of clatters and crashes and clunks, and yet when you make it to the bedroom your boyfriend’s attention is glued to his book as though by hypnosis. 

“Hi.” The word curves with the smile that takes you, tilting upwards. Remus looks up. 

“Hi, dovey.” He blinks foggily, taking you in with your hip leaned against the doorjamb and your ankles crossed awkwardly. “How was book club?” 

You feel your smile widen with delight. “It was great,” you profess. You aim for him, and Remus takes his book in one hand, holding the other out like he means to catch you. You land on the edge of the bed on your stomach, your feet dangling just above the floor behind you. “Everyone loved my banana bread.” 

“A show of good judgment,” Remus hums. He reaches behind you, helping you get your shoe off. “Is there any left?” 

One shoe comes free, and you let your foot fall back. “Mm, there was, but I left it for Maria.” 

Remus stops messing with your other shoe to look at you disappointedly. 

“I know, but she hosted! I had to be nice. I’ll make you another one soon.” 

He sighs, but it’s for show. Your other shoe slides off. “Fine, I suppose since she hosted.” 

“I knew you’d get it.” You pull your legs onto the bed and sit up, grinning at your boyfriend. He likes to play at selfishness, but you know he’d have done the same. Even if you’d asked, he would have told you to leave the bread. And he breaks easily now, returning your smile with one of his own. It feels like a warm tide rushing over you. 

“Oh. I feel like I should also warn you, I had quite a bit of wine.” 

Remus’ tongue presses into his cheek, a sort of outward-poking dimple. “Did you?”

“A little,” you say coyly, looking at him through your lashes. “It was sparkling and really yummy, what was I supposed to do?” 

“A valid point.” 

“So that’s just your warning. You’ve been warned.” 

“I will proceed with caution,” he assures you, a warmth to his voice. “What did everyone think of the book?”

“Oh.” You raise your eyebrows at him excitedly. “There was controversy. Big controversy. I super loved it, but a lot of other people thought it was the worst one she’d done so far!” 

“Really?”

“Yeah. They made some valid points, but I don’t know, maybe I’m easy to please, but I didn’t care about any of that stuff as much as I cared that I’d had a good time reading it, you know? And then everyone was giving their rankings of her books, and there were just some really crazy choices. Some people thought her second one was the best!” 

“No.” Remus manages to look upset for your sake, though he’s only heard about the books from you. “Did they really?” 

Your smile blooms anew at his enthusiasm, and you feel, suddenly urgently, that you’re not close enough to him. You move into his lap, but that’s not good enough either. At this point, Remus is looking at you with a fond, bemused sort of intrigue. You must be predictable enough, because only a soft puff of laughter exhales him when you start to worm your way under his sweater. 

It’s warm. You consider, for a moment, simply staying in there, with Remus’ chest and his smell and the sound of your own breathing, but ultimately decide you’d like to see him, too. You’d miss him too much. 

“Hello,” he says, not unhappily, as you break the surface of his neckline.

“Hi,” you say back. 

“To what do I owe this visit?” 

You shrug. It’s an odd movement, one of your shoulders stretching his sweater while the other bumps against his chest. “I wanted to be with you. It’s quite nice in here.” 

Remus only hums, tilting his head down to kiss your nose. It’s a slow, fond kiss, like he’s just decided to rest his lips there for a moment or two. It sends pleasant warm tingles from your face all the way down to your fingertips. 

“What else did you talk about?” he asks. 

“Hm?” 

“In book club.” 

“Oh. Well, not everyone there had read her other books, so we had to sort of get into the patterns and the things she always does. Some of it was routine for us, but totally unexpected for them, which makes sense I guess because…” 

You go on in circles and loops that even you can’t keep track of, your mind lax and happy and your lips moving seemingly on autopilot. You talk about the book itself and the people you read it with, and about the girl who’d hosted and how she’d had the cutest dog you’d ever seen, and does Remus remember that time you went to the animal shelter and saw that adorable puppy? Well, you mean no offense to the puppy because he was very cute, but this girl’s dog is even cuter than that. 

It’s an incalculable stretch of time later that you realize Remus has put down his book. 

“Oh, my god.” You lean your forehead on his shoulder. When you close your eyes, you feel like you’re floating. You really must be worse than you thought. “I’m so sorry. You were trying to read.” 

“Before you got home, yeah,” says Remus, his tone indulgent, “but now I’m talking to you.” 

“Yeah, because I won’t shut up because I’m all drunk,” you lament. “I know how annoying that is.” 

“Hey.” Your boyfriend’s voice is tender. “Who said anything about that? I’m not annoyed.” 

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure, sweetheart. Why would you assume that I was? I love talking to you.” 

You try to look up at him, and your nose bumps his chin violently. “Oh.” You try to draw back, but there’s nowhere to go. You’re confined to the neckline of Remus’ sweater. One of your hands snakes up to touch clumsily at his chin. “Shit, I’m sorry.” 

Remus tsks, his own hands coming on either side of your face to hold you still. “Don’t worry, I’m alright. Are you?” He runs a thumb gingerly over the bridge of your nose. 

It’ll probably bruise a little tomorrow, but that’s not something you’re going to tell him tonight. “Yeah,” you say meekly. “Thanks for dealing with me. It’s really nice of you.” 

“Oh, don’t,” he shushes you, pressing another gentle kiss to your nose. “I’m not being nice, sweetheart. And you’re not something to be dealt with. I love looking after you; it doesn’t cost me anything to do it.” 

You try to shrink down inside his sweater, and Remus tsks. 

“Tell me this, if I was blackout and legless, would you mind chatting with me and taking care of me?” 

“I’m not blackout drunk, Rem.” 

“For argument’s sake, let’s say.” 

You press your lips together, not wanting to concede the argument but your answer categorical. “No.” 

“Right, because you’ve done it before.” Remus looks at you with equal parts kindness and knowingness. “And were you annoyed with me then?” 

You’re almost offended he’d ask. “Of course not.” 

“I see.” His tongue pokes into his cheek again, lips quirking slightly. “Seems like that sort of thing might go both ways, no?” 

You push your face into his neck and sigh hard into his skin, making a little sound bubble up in his chest that sounds suspiciously giggle-esque. 

“You don’t always have to be right, you know.” 

“I usually am, though.” He wraps his arms around his own front, giving you a squeeze. “Best settle into that fact, dovey. It’ll make things much more efficient for us both.” 

[a-hazbin-reader]

Hii I love your work!

Could you do a (romantic but.. crush stage) headcanon of Alastor helping the reader and the reader gives him a kiss as a thank you and Alastor is like "what the hell was that?" Reader genuinely feeling bad for kissing him and Alastor says "you should be sorry" but then Alastor starts to constantly help the reader (even more than before) and everyone in the hotel knows what he's doing but reader is dense. Then eventually alastor just bursts into her bedroom shouting "FOR FUCK SAKE WHY WONT YOU KISS ME" (maybe not that but same energy)

Please and thank you :>

I'm just gonna...combine these two...

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Alastor being jealous, DOORS, Saucy?

Description: ☝️⬆️

You gave affection freely to those around you, everyone got a hug or a small peck on the cheek

So when you're struggling with something and Alastor helps you out? It's only natural for you to give him a quick kiss on the cheek

It's his reaction to it that makes you think you made a mistake in doing so, his body going stiff and gaze dark

You step back as you start to notice a green haze around him and the glass on his monocle cracking

"Don't you ever do that again, my dear."

"I'm-I'm sorry, Alastor-"

"You should be."

And just like that, he's back to normal, carrying on like nothing had happened and humming a jolly tune

But you still feel so guilty for making him so uncomfortable, that was the last thing you wanted

So you work hard to do better, to respect his boundaries and keep a respectful distance

It's not until later when Alastor has time to think about it that he actually realizes that he kinda enjoyed it

And that he's envious of the others who now freely get to soak up your attention and affection for doing little tasks

Like Husk getting scritches and scratches under his chin because he carried a box for you

Angel getting a warm hug with lots of nuzzling and cooing, all because he used his multiple arms to help you cook

Vaggie sheepishly accepting a thank you kiss because she caught you when you almost took a dive down the stairs

Charlie and Niffty are the worst offenders, always helping you and just eating up your praise and hugs

And now whenever Alastor helps you... you just give him a meek thank you and dash off

He's left there waiting for his hug and kiss that won't ever happen

He's not jealous, he told you not to thank him with physical affection

He just didn't realize that he was shooting himself in the foot when he snapped at you

So he starts trying to tempt you into it, taking every opportunity to help you out with every little thing

Alastor will physically shove the others out of the way in order to be the person who helps you out

And he never gets the proper thank you that he's looking for

It's getting to the point where you're driving him insane with those kissy lips and warm embraces

Why won't you just fucking give him some attention!? Oh yeah. Because he ruined it for himself

You do tell him that you're grateful for him and his help, sweetly smiling at him but keeping yourself at a distance

But it's not enough, he wants what everyone else is getting and then some

He hates being excluded or not being special and it's even worse when it comes to you

Alastor's thin patience suddenly snaps when one day while he's out running errands with you

The two of you bump into Zestial and the great overlord opens a door for you, earning a soft kiss on his cheek

It would almost be cute watching you struggle to do that, considering Zestial's height

But instead...Alastor is fucking irritated 😤

Zestial takes it well and you continue to run errands with Alastor for the rest of the day even though he's visibly sulky

His ears are bent back and his eyes are furious

You wonder what you did wrong

He's a bit distant from you for a couple days after that and you miss having him around

Even if you couldn't be with him, you still liked hanging around him and spending time with him

Just when you're starting to feel sorry for yourself and thinking you did something to offend him, wandering the hotel

He shows up by your side and grabs you, miraculously stopping you from almost falling into a fucking hole in the floor that wasn't there yesterday

Charlie is to blame somehow

You're just so happy to see him hanging out with you again that you hug him out instinct

Only to realize you fucked up and try to pull away-

But Alastor's firm grip on you stops you from moving, and he's looking at you in a way that makes your face heat up

"U-uh...um...thank you...Alastor..."

He tuts at you while shaking his head, pulling you flush against him as he leans in closer

"Words won't suffice anymore, my dear~ I'll only accept one thing as payment for my heroic services~"

You definitely don't melt when he suddenly kisses you and if your arms find their way around his neck then...

Who are you to deny him his payment? Kiss that bastard until he's crawling away and begging for mercy

Me hoping I didn't just shoot myself in the foot by bringing up the door thing again..

[wordsarelife]

—august

pairing: mattheo riddle x fem!reader

summary: mattheo chose you and still you wonder why he even broke up with his ex in the first place

warnings: feeling like the wrong choice, insecure reader, angst but fluff ending

notes: i just wrote a little drabble since i already had a planned fic ready for lacy, i hope you still like it!

her hair was flowing effortlessly over her shoulders, caressing her back like it was some sort of clothing. she looked effortlessly pretty in general, soft pink lips and warm brown eyes reflecting the light of the sun when she would walk through the courtyard.

and the worst thing about her? she was nice. simply put. you couldn’t even manage to hate her, because next to being beautiful, she had a charming personality, a great sense of humor and friends everywhere she went.

you had understood if she had hated you. you, the new girlfriend of her first great love. but she didn’t and that made it impossibly worse.

“hey, y/n” she had greeted one morning, a smile plastered on her face and happiness reflecting in her eyes. “theo mentioned that you had some problems regarding the divination essay” she said and added, before you were able to retort something: “i finished mine a few days ago and thought it might help you to read over it. it was indeed a very hard task, i struggled too”

“oh” you had said, dumbfounded, and stared at the pieces of parchment she was holding in your direction. “thank you, aurora”

“no problem” she grinned. “and rory is fine, all my friends call me that”

she had left in a hurry, having to return books to the library, and you spent your time looking after her in awe, surprise and insecurity flooding your features.

it was beyond you why mattheo had decided to break up with her. aurora turner was simply perfect and you certainly weren’t.

"what's going on in there, huh?" mattheo slipped into the space beside you, touching your head with one of his fingers softly.

"oh, nothing" you quickly excused, taking your eyes off of aurora and looking to the book in front of you. "this reading for muggle studies is just taking up my brain"

"romeo and juliet?" mattheo questioned, studying the leatherbound book.

"yeah" you sighed. "the english is kinda off"

"i know" he shrugged, turning the book around in his hands and opening it to a random page.

"you know?" you repeated, trying not to laugh. "i never as much saw you look at a book before"

"i liked this one" he smiled.

your smirk died down. "oh, i didn't know that" you tried to find his eyes. "why did you never mention it? i would've read it sooner then"

"it's not a big deal, that was ages ago" he paused, unsure if it was okay to finish the sentence, but you urged him on, nodding repeatedly so he would continue. "rory liked it"

"oh" you said plainly, before you realized that your reaction was all the more telling of your inner jealousy and insecurity about his old relationship. "i mean cool"

"y/n" mattheo muttered, laying the book down in front of you. "it really doesn't matter. we don't even have to mention it again"

"i don't want you to feel like you can't tell me something, just because you experienced it with your ex" you smiled, but it was costing you all your strength. "you can talk about the past, it doesn't bother me"

"that's clearly a lie" mattheo saw through you completely. "you shouldn't have to hide your feelings to make me feel better"

you sighed, realising that it was to no use to lie to him. "sorry, i just—" you shook your head "i don't even know why you decided to break up with her in the first place and i think i'm scared that you'll realize that at one point too"

mattheo looked at you with a soft smile, his gaze searching your eyes as if trying to convey everything he felt with just that look. "y/n, i'm gonna be honest. it’s not that rory wasn’t great," he began, his tone gentle. "she is a really good person, and there was nothing wrong with her. but that doesn’t mean she was the right person for me."

you blinked, trying to process his words as he continued.

"i realized that being with someone just because they seem perfect on the surface doesn’t mean it’s the right fit. we just didn’t connect in the way i needed. with you..." he hesitated, as if searching for the right words, "...it’s different. you make me feel understood. you get me in a way that no one else does."

you looked at him with so much admiration that he had to look down, his cheeks turning a deep shade of red.

"look" he said, when he was able to look in your eyes again. "dating rory was like constantly standing on a pedestal and people expecting me to be something different than i was. that didn't feel right, and it shouldn't. but being with you feels like coming home after a long day, realizing that there's someone in my corner even if no one else likes me for who i am and not for who they see in me"

"i didn't know you felt like that" you muttered, ashamed that you had possibly made him uncomfortable.

"i don't, not anymore" he smiled. "not since i met you. because i don't care about the others. i just care about us, you and me"

"i love you" you said as he kissed your cheek, pulling you closer by your waist.

"i love you" mattheo mumbled against your mouth. "don't ever think you're worth less than her, just because you're not her. if anything that's what makes you more special to me"

you nodded, teary-eyed, as he pushed his lips forward to meet yours. your hands toyed with the hem of his curls as he deepend the kiss.

after that day you never questioned mattheo's choice again. and you could see that both him and rory held a lot of respect for each other. but both were not even interested in anything deeper. mattheo never looked up when he heard her voice anywhere. rory never came to the tree you had often seen them kissing at, back when they had been together.

you realized that being enough for mattheo had never meant being perfect—it had only ever meant being yourself.

[urfavleo777]

warnings: age gap, tattoo artist! colby x reader, alcohol

"Angel's wings!" your best friend exclaims, speaking completely seriously. Your other friend approves, clapping her hands eagerly. "Get them tattooed!"

You almost choke on your drink when you hear how seriously Katrina gives you a new idea for your first tattoo. If someone told you that friendship between three people doesn't exist, you would laugh at them. The three of you are living proof that it's not the number of people in the group that matters, but the love that exists between you. Each of you is different, but that is the most beautiful thing. There is nothing worse than boredom and monotony in friendship.

"Come on, you'll be eighteen in an hour. Do something that will make you happy, not your parents." Sophia, usually the voice of reason, tries to convince you.

You don't know if it's the alcohol you just drank, but in a split second you undergo an internal transformation. You'll be of age in an hour. No one will be able to lecture you. Even your parents who, instead of spending this birthday time with their daughter, decided to go to the mountains. At first you reacted with sadness, but over time you were glad that the situation had turned out this way because you could invite your two favorite girls over for the night.

Katrina and Sophia look at you with impatient eyes, encouraging you to make a quick decision. You take a deep breath, tilting your head back. As pathetic as it sounds, you try your hardest to get advice from the ceiling.

You look back at your waiting friends. They send drunken glances your way, which only reinforces the fact that you must probably look like one of them at this point. Sophia and Katarina's eyes widen. Something unexpected is about to happen; something that will change the course of history forever.

Katarina clenches her fists like a true boxing legend, preparing for the worst possible scenario. With each subsequent inhalation, you feel even more excitement and arousal wash over you. You open your mouth to announce the official verdict.

"If not now, never, right?"

After saying these words, you're crushed under the bodies of these two freaks. And, you swear to yourself that if your parents had been home, after all those squeals of happiness, you would have ended up under a bridge.

"The best decision you've ever made, Y/n! I'm so proud," Sophia squeals excitedly, and Katrina joins in. You realize that you still hold the glass in your hand. You hiss, knowing that you'll definitely need to change the sheets of your bed after tonight. "Don't worry about it! Let's go to the tattoo artist!"

"Now?" you keep mumbling under their bodies.

Katrina and Sophia step away from you, exchanging meaningful glances with each other. You are finally able to catch your breath, but you don't really understand what they're trying to tell you.

"Yes. Now." Sophia grins. "Katrina, are you thinking about the same person as me?"

The friend nods her head in response, also with a big grin on her face.

"Oh, yeah! The handsomest, hottest and most expensive tattoo artist in town," she starts counting and you wonder why you've never heard of him before. "Y/n, we guarantee you the best fucking fun."

"Let's fucking do this!" They both squeal, grabbing your hands and pulling you out of the bed.

***

"You guys didn't even give me a chance to change clothes!"

You are wearing a black body suit and really low rise jeans so people on the street can see a bit of skin, which makes you feel a little uncomfortable.

"You look great." Sophia assures you and Katrina nods to her. Well, they're wearing perfectly balanced sweaters compared to you. They decided to make you the main star without outshining you with clothes. You feel like standing out of the crowd, which you don't like very much.

"Do you think this tattoo artist will accept us without prior consultation?" you ask, genuinely curious. "Maybe we should call him? We'd better get back home..."

"Relax, Y/n," you turn into a street you've probably never been to. Katrina tries to convince you, but with each step you take, you become less and less sure. Even though your parents have well-paid jobs, they usually don't let you hang around the rich districts. They would be disappointed if they knew that while they were away their daughter was getting a tattoo, not really knowing where.

"You said he was an expensive tattoo artist. I don't think I want to spend money this way." You continue, feeling the alcohol drain from you. You regain consciousness and regret saying yes to your friends. "Maybe we should really turn back?"

"Y/n," you stop in front of a building emanating LED light. The girls move closer to you and one of them puts a hand on your shoulder. Sophia, the fucking voice of reason, says: 

"He is my brother's friend. They have been friends since childhood. He practiced on my brother, making the first patterns. He would never take money from me or my friends. We are always out of line. Trust me, you're in good hands."

"He was the one who gave me that big tattoo you liked so much," finishes Katrina.

You sigh, trying to convince yourself first and foremost. Sophia pulls out her phone and brings it closer to your face.

The first thing that catches your eye are the huge white numbers on the screen. What's more, they don't seem blurry at all. You must be really sober. You take a deep breath, recalling the quote of your favorite teacher in your head.

12:00. Carpe diem.

 "It's time to go fucking crazy, Y/n." 

***

"Sophia? What's for today?" It’s a male voice. Raspy, yet soft. The sound of it makes you whip your head over to your friends, but you're trying to stay calm. He lets out a heavy sigh before humming to himself in thought. Only after a while he notices that Sophia is not alone. "And who is this?"

"Hello, Colby. Meet Y/n, your new client." 

And the way he shakes your hand is firm but gentle, not as hard as you think it'd be given the size of his biceps probably are larger than your head. But then he softly grips your elbow and guides you into the chair with a hand on your back. "Don't worry, I don't bite."

"Well, I thought I would have to convince you.. longer."

You flush a little under his gaze because he's noticed how you're shaking like a leaf next to him. And the way he smiles indicates he might enjoy biting you anyways... and maybe you'd let him. 

"I was just about to close, but you know perfectly well that I will always make an exception for you, Sophia." Your friend smiles at his words.

"So, what are we doing tonight?" he focuses all his attention on you. You swallow, not really knowing what to answer. Katrina decides to save your ass from total embarrassment.

"Angel's wings." 

He looks like he's about to roll his eyes.

"Seriously, I can't count how many girls asked me for the exact same pattern. Try something more creative."

"I'd like to stick with the wings, please. In a place invisible to the eye."

"Getting a tattoo so you don't show it to anyone? How old are you anyway?"

"Eighteen." He doesn't look convinced. With one movement of your hand, you pull your ID from your back pocket. Colby, as you can guess, surprised by the concrete, grabs the ID in his hand and looks at it carefully.

"She's so young." When he talks about you in the third person, something happens to you. "Are you sure you want those fucking wings?"

"Come on, Colby. You did this to my brother many times." Sophia interjects. "Don't ruin her birthday."

"Ah, yes. Happy birthday or something." You can tell he’s in a good mood based on the playful amusement in his voice. 

"Thanks," you hang your head.

"We have to do something about her shyness." he turns to your friends.

"Maybe wings between her tits? I bet no girl has ever asked for this," suggests Katrina. You almost choke on your saliva. You want to get up from that chair and run out.

"That sounds perfect." His voice is sweet with a touch of flirtiness, and you swear you can hear the smile in it. "What do you think, Y/n?"

"There's no way I'm going to show you my tits." You take courage. Colby laughs loudly. He clearly takes pleasure in your attitude and shakes his head, leaning in to watch you.

"It's your choice." You bite at your lip instead of answering him. 

"Come on, Y/n. We won't look either." Katrina says and Sophia nods.

You've already succumbed to them once in a while. Nothing will stop you from doing it again.

The girls send you their last kisses. After a while, it's just you and your tattoo artist left in the room.

***

You're honestly glad when the uncomfortable silence is drowned out by the song "Ultraviolence" by Lana Del Rey. You asked to simply turn on the radio, but you were surprised when Colby asked you for the title. What was even weirder was when he used the fucking vinyl of one of your favorite albums instead of Spotify.

He hums to himself. "Those are nice."

You got rid of your bra. No one has ever complimented your boobs, but you smile slightly, burying your face in your hands.

He gives you a little wink before stenciling what you had in mind, his fingertips tracing the lines of the ink that leaves goosebumps across your skin.

There's a lingering feeling as he pulls his hand back. You think he's toying with you. Frightful little thing, you are and here he is wanting to play with his pretty little client. Next thing you know, his hand is around your throat.

You tense and realize that he has moved some of your hair to the other side to give more access to the space between your tits. It definitely could have been done easier and better, but the twinkle in his eyes said he did it on purpose. Oh yes, he was definitely having fun with you. The way his hand barely grazed your throat and the side of your neck before he would gently scratch your arm with his blunt nails and pull away.

He let's out a huff of quiet laughter and then gets his tools ready. "So, y/n, you have a safeword?"

And you're brought out of your thoughts about his large hands because... "Huh?"

"A safeword. It's big."

W..what's big? You can't stop your eyes from flitting down to his thighs and what may lie between them. He laughs and shifts so your eyes are instantly back up and staring at his eyes that glimmer in amusement.

"The tattoo, I mean. It's a big piece. Need to know if it'll be too much, yeah?"

[seeingivy]

world war sibling

ryomen sukuna x f!reader

**part of my best friend's (older brother) fic

previous part linked here

--

“you know, you kind of picked the worst spot for your first.” sukuna mumbles. 

“that doesn’t help, sukuna. like in the slightest.” 

sukuna retreats his original comment as the buzzing of the tattoo gun starts again, accompanied by your death-like grip on his hand and the tears spilling out of your eyes. and he almost feels bad for his slightly snide comment – which was intended to make you laugh – as he leans forward, wiping away the wetness and sweat on your forehead, before pressing a kiss to your cheek. 

“you’re actually doing great, princess. i cried like a baby during my first.” 

“yeah. it was fucking annoying.” toji mutters. 

you laugh, earning you a smile from both toji and sukuna, as the former continues buzzing into your arm. 

toji, who you can’t help but find familiar, is sukuna’s most trusted tattoo artist. upon their first meeting, he had bent the rules for sukuna at seventeen (i.e. legally under the age for a tattoo) and since then, had been one of sukuna’s favorite artists in the area. 

and you could tell why sukuna liked him. he was quiet and serious – sukuna’s favorite type of person – but here and there, would offer some strange story about sukuna from years prior, that made the both of them smile when he recounted the memory. 

long story short, he was yet another undercover sap. you were starting to think that sukuna had a type. 

“did he really cry?” you ask. 

“that’s rich coming from him – he picked a worse spot than you did. i had to stop and give him a break before i could continue.” toji mutters. 

you bite down on your lip as you lean against sukuna’s shoulder, the stinging feeling on the inner part of your wrist making your heart race and your head pulsate, as he whispers into your ear, trying to distract you from the pain. 

“are you excited for tonight?” sukuna asks. 

“yeah.” you whisper. 

“where are you going?” he asks. 

you whimper in response, to which sukuna clicks his tongue, before asking again. 

“the bar on sixteenth. they….oh my fucking god…they have happy hour after five.” 

“figured i might as well ask you now before the four of you are drunk out of your mind.” sukuna scoffs. 

after what was a painstakingly awkward conversation between you and yuuji three weeks prior, things were slowly returning back to normal, with the smallest of steps. the two of you went back to studying together, and the week prior, you had returned to your usual weekend plans of going out with him, megumi, and kugisaki again. 

now and then he’d send you strange buzzfeed quizzes at three in the morning, you would send back pictures of cute dogs at work, and finally resumed your original plans of dinner at your parents every other week. 

yuuji and sukuna had yet to cross paths again, except for the curt greetings they’d give each other when yuuji dropped you off or sukuna came to pick you up. sukuna hadn’t gotten over the fact that yuuji had punched you and yuuji…well, he was almost too embarrassed to show his face, let alone even ask for an apology. 

yuuji was always like that, so in his head about whatever it was sukuna was thinking. and while normally, you’d encourage him to just talk it out – knowing how sukuna still felt about the entire thing meant that you had tabled trying to get them to get along for the time being. 

“that’s it.” toji states, before pushing off of his rolling chair and rummaging through the drawer at his side. 

you sit up, blinking the tears out of your eyes, as sukuna leans over your shoulder, the two of you admiring the bloody mess on the inside of your wrist, of a waterlily. 

“it’s perfect, birthday girl.” sukuna whispers. 

“you think my mom will kill me?” you ask. 

“isn’t that kind of the point?”

you laugh as sukuna helps you off the chair and walks you over to the little stand, where toji wraps the area in plastic before walking over to ring you up. and it’s almost a joke – how quickly sukuna snatches your credit card from your fingers, before offering his own. 

“i was going to use that.” you deadpan. 

“it’s on me. it’s your birthday.” 

“you know i don’t –” 

“i know you don’t care about birthdays, doll. but i’m not a piece of shit. toji, i’m paying.” 

the novelty of birthdays, parties, and celebrations seemed to wear off around the time that you turned twelve. a few embarrassing mishaps – like inviting twenty people to a bowling alley just to have only yuuji show up or not having anyone to invite at all the following year out of mortification led to an almost disdain towards the day. 

and after that, the plan was always simple. the night of, the pair of you would go out – originally for ice cream, but those quickly transitioned into sugar sweet margaritas two years ago when you turned twenty-one. and while the plan with yuuji still standing for tonight, sukuna was afforded the entire morning and afternoon. 

it was just another day. meaning you and sukuna were going to eat breakfast together – though you did think the little candle he put in your french toast was a cute touch – before heading to your tattoo appointment. he bought you a new pair of earrings and a ribbon for your hair, but only because he insisted that they reminded him of you earlier this week, and obviously had nothing to do with your birthday. 

and it was perfect – you were going to walk over to the little arts and crafts store after your tattoo appointment, so you and sukuna could make bracelets together before you had to go to the bar with yuuji. it was yet another silly trend you had seen on tiktok – picking out beads that looked like your partner's eyes – and making bracelets out of them, and sukuna was all too quick to oblige. 

sammy was supposed to stop over briefly at some point to drop off a gift and sukuna was going to tuck you into bed at the end of the night. 

you could tell that he was trying really hard to contain it, whatever it was he was feeling over the fact that it was your birthday. because knowing him, if he had his way, he’d be going the entire ten miles and buying you a plethora of gifts and dinners if he could. 

but it took a few talks for him to realize it actually made you really uncomfortable. which is the only reason he let you limit him to three gifts (a bridgerton season three mug, a new taylor swift vinyl, and another lingerie set, which he claimed was more for him than it was for you). 

and though it was really simple – two red velvet cupcakes on a random park bench and a quiet night out, but you could still feel it. the excessive amounts of kisses he was placing on your shoulder and the way he was opening the doors, that he was trying his best to go above and beyond to make you feel special. 

it was sweet. and quiet. just the way you liked it. 

--

you swing open the apartment door to your worst nightmare. 

the main room is decked out in streamers, balloons, and a pretty pink banner – all of which sukuna set up the night before when you fell asleep for your breakfast together. you thought it was a little bit over dramatic – decorating the entire place for just the two of you – but you have the slightest hunch that it was more for this. 

“did you seriously invite all of them?” you whisper, balling your hands into fists at your side as they all cheer, running over to give you excited hugs. 

instead of what you were promised – sammy stopping over briefly to bring you a gift – almost everyone you know is milling around in your apartment. yuuji, kugisaki, and megumi but also maki, gojo, sammy, and shoko. 

even megumi’s sister is here. 

sukuna mouths i had no idea as sammy walks up to your side, placing a shot in your hand. 

“drink up, birthday girl!” 

“i’m good, sam. you go ahead.” 

“room is really tense. i’d take it if i were you.” sammy mumbles, before walking off. 

yuuji walks up to your side, offering you a hug, before pulling back and placing his hands on your shoulders. 

“i tried to stop it. but sister dearest insisted.” yuuji whispers. 

“oh god, of course she did. did you tell her i would hate this?” you ask. 

“i did. and then she said, ‘who hates birthdays?’ and invited everyone anyway.” yuuji responds, perfectly mimicking sammy’s high pitched voice. 

you groan. 

“did you mention the bowling alley?” 

“i did. she responded by saying that means there’s more cake for us.” 

yuuji offers you a pinched smile as sukuna snakes his hand across your shoulder, leaning down to whisper in your ear. 

“i’m so sorry, angel. i swear i had no idea.” sukuna whispers. 

“i know. you know how sammy can be. goes a little overboard…kind of stubborn.” you respond. 

“you have another problem.” yuuji states. 

the two of you turn to your left, as yuuji lifts his hand and awkwardly scratches at the back of his neck. 

“you remember maki’s shitty sister?” yuuji asks. 

“yeah.” 

“she’s your sister’s girlfriend.” 

you feel your throat dry as you dart your head to the left – to where kugisaki and maki are swirling a glass of lemonade in their hands with geto – and to then to the right where sammy is rubbing circles into mai’s back, the two of them talking in hushed tones with gojo. 

“this city is too fucking small.” you mumble. 

“is it that bad?” sukuna asks, his eyes darting between the two of you. 

“that’s the understatement of the year. imagine me and sammy on…on like steroids.” you respond, miserably. 

“alright, well. megumi and i did at least get sammy to get a cake from chaupain, so how about you just eat it in the corner while sukuna and i do damage control? we’ll just keep them away from each other and try to get them to leave as soon as possible.” yuuji asks. 

yuuji looks past your shoulder to where sukuna is standing, waiting for a vote of approval. and given the fact that he basically feels like a fish in water at the current moment, he agrees. 

--

“let’s see the tattoo.” megumi states. 

you all but oblige, holding out your wrist for megumi and tsumiki to admire, watching as their attentive eyes note the needle work. 

“this is beautiful. why the waterlily?” tsumiki asks. 

you smile. 

“like monet’s waterlilies. it’s one of my favorite art pieces.” you respond. 

“that’s neat. it’s very pretty.” she responds, giving you a warm smile. 

“where’d you get it? yuuji has been thinking about getting one.” megumi asks. 

“downtown. there’s a tattoo parlor across from that bar that we did glee trivia at once.” 

you watch as tsumiki and megumi give each other a look, the former pulling her soft featherlike touch away from your wrist and crossing her arms over her chest. 

“who did your tattoo?” megumi asks. 

“oh. he’s just some guy sukuna’s friends with. he’s been going to him since he was like seventeen..” 

megumi clenches his jaw, before placing his hands at his side. 

“black hair, scar near his lip?” 

you pause. 

“yeah. his name is toji. do you know him or something?” you ask. 

“something like that.” megumi responds, before shuffling off towards the drinks. 

tsumiki gives you an almost apologetic smile, before leaning forward and whispering in your ear. 

“don’t take it personal. he’s our dad.” 

“your…” 

“yes, our deadbeat dad. it is rather off putting finding out that he’s had money…or you know, a job this entire time, and friends, when we’ve been trying to make ends meet forever. we always had a hunch that he was there but you know, kind of confirms it if you were there this morning.” 

you pinch your eyes shut, before placing a hand on her shoulder. 

“i’m so sorry.” you mumble. 

“you didn’t know. i’m going to check on megumi, though, if that’s okay? you know how he can be.” 

“please.” 

you drag your tired legs to the corner of the kitchen island, pouring yourself a shot, before slumping down into the chair. and your very futile efforts of getting a second to yourself are all but squashed when you find satoru at your side, sliding a slice of cake your way. 

“hi birthday girl.” 

you sigh. 

“hi satoru. thank you for coming.”

“i do suppose i should apologize for showing up. i didn’t realize you hate birthdays.” 

“i don’t hate them, it’s just…the big party thing. not really my jam. for obvious reasons. i just accidentally brought up someone’s deadbeat dad and somehow brought together the most homicidal pair of sisters in japan into my apartment.” you respond. 

satoru smiles in response, looking out to the group of them as well. 

“it’s basically world war sibling in here right now. but your boys are handling the sisters decently well. and….getting along for once.” 

you smile, looking over at sukuna and sammy on the left. 

“i know, right? it’s actually kind of cute. they keep looking over at each other every few minutes and giving each other thumbs up to confirm it’s still going good.” you mumble. 

“kind of expected. both of them are half responsible for making your worst nightmare happen on your birthday of all days, it makes sense that they’d put their shit aside for one second to make it at least a little bit better.” satoru states. 

sukuna looks over at you, shooting you a weary glance – like he’s trying to gauge how you’re feeling – which you shake off. 

“plus, at some point, they’re going to realize that it’s better for both of their interests to get along again. maybe this is when it’ll happen and then something good will come out of your birthday.” satoru adds. 

you pause, looking down to continue demolishing the frosting of the cake with the fork. 

“you’re quite hopeful.” 

“i mean, yeah. they’re brothers and they were starting to get close again and that’s part of it. but at some point, they’re going to understand that it’s going to cause a real block for both of them if they continue acting the way they do. sukuna’s your boyfriend but yuuji’s been the first person you’ve gone to your entire life. can’t exactly give one up for the other.” 

you smile. 

“you think about this an awful lot, don’t you?” 

“suguru and i talk about it in bed every night before we go to sleep. it is riveting.” satoru affirms. 

“i’m glad we could provide some entertainment for you.” you respond, giving him a smile. 

in the three seconds you look away, whatever tension that was boiling in the room seems to come to a head, when maki and mai seemed to have both reached for the last piece of cake – and both of their guard dogs, kugisaki and sammy, were ready to fight over it. 

“just split it in fucking half.” sukuna mutters, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“that’s a great idea! i’ll do it for you guys, here.” yuuji responds, before getting four pairs of irritated eyes staring at him, as he retreats his hands. 

you sigh as you walk up to their sides, satoru on your heels, as you take the spot in between sukuna and yuuji. the two of them give you a pinched smile that barely meets their eyes. 

“i didn’t eat the slice that gojo brought me yet. you’re more than welcome to take mine.” you offer. 

“okay yeah, that’s fine. you guys can take the leftovers.” sammy responds. 

kugisaki rolls her eyes. 

“why should we take it? we reached for it first.” kugisaki mutters. 

mai turns to sammy, shaking her head. 

“it’s fine, sammy. you guys have it.” mai responds. 

“typical. trying to take the higher ground to look good, aren’t you?” maki asks. 

“well, leave it to you to make a scene at your friend’s birthday party.” mai mutters back. 

maki scoffs. 

“she’s your girlfriend’s sister. you’re just trying to do the right thing to look a certain way, like you always fucking do. it’s the same shit you do with our parents and –” maki starts. 

“okay, guys. there’s kind of a time and place for this type of thing and –” yuuji starts. 

“shut up, yuuji.” kugisaki and maki shout in unison. 

sukuna clenches his jaw.  

“okay, seriously. that’s enough. just take a beat and walk away. all four of you.” sukuna mutters, as the two of them walk off. 

sukuna’s tone is intimidating enough to get all of them to back off. and you lean back against the counter, watching as they both sulk off into their respective corners, as you rub the sides of your temples. sammy joins you at your side, taking an awkwardly long sip of her lemonade, as you sigh. 

“are you going to take yuuji and sukuna’s advice next time? i really do hate birthday parties.” you ask. 

sammy turns to her side, her eyes incredulous. 

“you can’t be serious. you’re not blaming that on me, right?” sammy asks. 

you widen your eyes. 

“what?” 

“i was just trying to do a nice thing for you. all of these people wanted to see you, for your birthday, and you were just kind of side sweeping all of them. how was i supposed to know that mai’s sister was going to be here?” 

you groan. 

“i was obviously joking, sammy. trying to lighten the mood and all.” 

“you’re the queen of passive aggressiveness. i know you weren’t. god forbid, we can’t all be like your boy toys and spend our entire life trying to read your mind since you can’t seem to say whatever is on it.” 

you roll your eyes. 

“so what if i wasn’t joking? you clearly need to hear it when all you do is just what you think is best. i wasn’t side sweeping any of them, most of them would have understood if i just wanted to spend the day the way i usually do.” 

yuuji tries to interject. 

“listen. i think we’re all feeling a lot of things right now –” 

“you don’t have to read my mind when there were two people right there telling you that i would have hated it. you just purposely chose not to listen.” you finish. 

“you’re shitty. i was just trying to be nice. and then you wonder why i never want to talk to you.” 

yuuji can tell it stings from the way your face falls. 

“sammy, come on. it’s –” yuuji starts. 

you suppose you should be thankful that no one got injured this time. because in the split second that sammy tries to shove yuuji away and tell him to butt out of it, he accidentally backs his elbow into the little rack, sending two of the mugs shattering to the floor. 

it takes one peak to realize that one of them is the one sukuna quite literally unboxed for you this morning. you didn’t even have a chance to use it. 

you turn to sukuna, who gives you what might be the most irritated look you’ve ever seen him muster, before he shuffles towards the closet for the broom. you’re sure that sammy takes some type of hint that it’s time for her to go and geto’s able to wrangle the rest of them to leave too as sukuna shuffles up the glass. 

it’s a quick exodus after that, the room so tense with the heat in the air that almost everyone was scrambling to get out to take a breath. sukuna isn’t halfway to closing the door on geto and gojo when the tears start bubbling out of your eyes, warm and hot on your cheeks. 

“oh, angel. come here.” sukuna whispers, opening up his arms as you dig your forehead into his shoulder. 

you can hear yuuji shuffling behind the two of you, boxing the last of the leftovers, as you cry into sukuna’s shoulder, making a considerably large snot and tear filled stain on your shirt. 

“i hate my birthday. this is…this is so fucking stupid, sukuna.” 

sukuna rubs circles into your back, before wrapping his hand around your cheek and wiping the mess of glitter and tears away. 

“like, i know i shouldn’t expect much but i just wanted to have a nice day. it’s so stupid that sammy’s so stubborn that she invited everyone. and i know i should have had fun but…but everything just kept going wrong.” 

sukuna can tell that you’re subconsciously reaching for your hair, pulling down on your locks and pulling out strays. because while you had left your picking at your skin habits for bad moments, you seemed to angrily pull at your head when you were tense. 

“turn around.” sukuna murmurs, as you heave a sigh and continue your rant as sukuna tasks himself with braiding your hair. 

“toji is megumi’s dad. and now i’m scared i made him feel like shit by bringing it up. and i know i didn’t do anything wrong but if someone just randomly brought up my deadbeat dad i wouldn’t feel great about it either.” 

“i’m sure he’s not mad at you, baby.” sukuna offers. 

“and fucking sammy. we were just getting along but…but she always does shit like this. i wasn’t blaming her for what happened, but i damn well could have. if literally the two people who know me the best are teling you that i wouldn’t enjoy this, why would you go ahead and do it anyways? and then on top of that, a whole fucking scene where she ended up yelling at me.” 

“do you want me to kill her?” 

“would you? she pushed yuuji and it broke our mugs.”  

sukuna finishes the end of the braid and secures it with an elastic, before placing his hands on your shoulder and swinging you back around to face him. 

“i’ll get you another one.” 

“aren’t they limited edition?” 

“i’ll bid on ebay. it’s not a big deal.” 

“sukuna.” 

“i had to bid on the first two on ebay anyways. i can literally just do it again baby, it’s not a big deal.” 

two feet away, yuuji feels like he’s intruding. and living in an alternate universe. because it’s the first time he’s seen you like this with someone else – venting so openly, accepting his affections so freely as he presses a kiss to your cheek and pulls at your wrists to stop you from picking at your skin. 

and sukuna seems like an entire stranger. brushing his fingers against your cheek so gently, the tone in his voice so uncharacteristically soft as he tries to comfort you. bidding on flowery mugs on ebay, braiding your hair to get you to stop pulling at it. 

yuuji feels guilty. maybe he really did have it all wrong. because the things that sukuna was doing were so arbitrary, but they were making all the difference at curbing the tears pouring out of your eyes.

maybe he just didn't get it.

“now mention the good things.” sukuna states. 

you glare at him. 

“there are no good things.” 

sukuna spares a glance over his shoulder to yuuji, gesturing for him to join, before looking back at you. 

“really? you can’t even think of one?”

yuuji catches his drift as he walks up to your side, slinging his arm around your shoulder. 

“you’re a smart girl. you can figure it out.” yuuji offers. 

you roll your eyes. 

“and now you two are ganging up on me. is this really the time?” 

the two of them laugh, even more delighted when you crack a smile for the first time in hours, before the two of them give each other a nod and wrap both of their arms around you. 

“still nothing good?” yuuji asks. 

“nope. you’re both crushing me to death. and you smell.” 

sukuna presses a kiss to your forehead and yuuji pinches at the side of your cheek. 

“how about now?” sukuna asks. 

“you guys are kind of annoying, you know that?” 

you pull back, placing a hand on both of their shoulders, and darting your eyes between the two of them. 

“are you guys being buddies for my birthday or are you actually making up?” 

sukuna rolls his eyes. 

“obviously the latter. we aren’t sisters.” 

“you’re fucking kidding. like the two of you are any better.” you state.  

yuuji scoffs. 

“they broke two whole fucking ceramic mug. and ruined a birthday party. sisters are a whole different ballpark.” 

“you punched me in the face and ruined a family dinner. how is that any different?” 

sukuna and yuuji both scoff, before yuuji reaches forward to pinch your cheek. 

“are you going to hold that over my head forever?” 

“basically. for both of you actually.” 

sukuna shuffles over to the fridge, tasking himself with stacking the freshly made boxes of cake in the fridge. 

“i think we’ll live.” 

--

three days later, with all the leftover heaviness from your birthday gone, yuuji takes you out for drinks on your birthday. and while sammy gave you a halfhearted apology, you swallowed it down for the tiem being and let it go. 

things were well – with yuuji and sukuna getting along and things being somewhat on the come up with sammy. though that feeling only lasts a few hours before sukuna sends you six calls, the seventh of which you finally answer when you make your way out of the bar. 

“hi sukuna. you okay?” 

you hear a sniffle on the other side of the phone. 

“how drunk are you?” he asks, his voice raspy. 

“what?” 

“can you drive or do i need to come get you guys?” 

you cover your free ear with your hand, trying to tune out the blaring music, as you press the phone against your ear harder. 

“i can drive, i barely had half of my margarita. is everything –” 

“you need to come to my mom’s house. as soon as possible. leave now.” 

“is everything fi –” 

“my dad is dead. as soon as you can, y/n.” 

--

next part linked here

an: ok my set up was done sorry for this ass chapter again the next few will be considerably better since i've been planning them out properly

taglist: @porridgesblog @k0z3me @sugu-love @yihona-san06 @sweetenertea @skzismyhome @mykyoon @violetmatcha @rebeccawinters @shotenvinsoot  @itzmeme @gojoswifeyyys-world @cutiejg @chilichopsticks @ghostreadersthings @charlie-xo @whoami-72 @heijihattorisgf @megu-meow @complexivelovely @multiplefandomthings @hoebuns @lzaj19 @glossygreene @ramluvr @sureconfused @najaemism @manduse @imhorn1help @gamergirl5125 @r0ckst4rjk @invisible-mori @isaacdaknight @wishmemel @gyros-cum-sock @wishmemel @suftsunshine @i0099 @cowgirlikets @haitanibros0007 @stuffeddeer @yoontaedotin @ec3lipsy @armani78 @awkwardaardvarkforever @kereseth @leave-rae-alone @ruruvia @princess-ackerman @jjkwritingss @lilkiwikiara @opchara @telepathicheartss @starriesworlds @raechu11 @exprimidordefresas @nxxrxm @aalloochaat @strangehuman101 @tzutology

[evilminji]

Actually? WOULD Earth be the ones to petition Oa?

They are interstellar Space Interpol. You don't usually call them on different parts of your OWN settlements or systems. You call them in when someone is breaking THE Laws. Not necessarily YOUR laws, though obviously by breaking THE laws they clearly ARE. But THE Big Laws(tm).

Like Geneva Convention for Space type laws.

You have discovered Planet or King X is committing WAR CRIMES. Call Oa. Tax fraud? That's an inter-personal planet side issue they can't help you with. Pointing Nukes at your nursery settlement and threatening to blow up the infants there unless you give them sex-slaves?

Knock-knock! Taste HARD Light Constructs!

But if so? Then how would the situation get so out of hand on Earth? With the G.I.W.? Simple. Tell me, Mr. President, what do you know of the current day to day life of villagers in rural Siberia?

That they exist? Could you even NAME their village, if I referenced specific individuals? Likely not. And no one would realistically expect you too.

There are countless planets out there! With Leaders busy with local industrial conferences and infrastructure bills. Farming regulations. Talks with that planet a few stars over. Very busy. What do THEY know of Earth? Why would they NEED too?

But! As we know, Ectoplasm is EVERYWHERE. Not just earth. And? Thin spots are not just an Earth-centric phenomenon. Other planets most CERTAINLY would have them too. And depending on the species? The culture? To quote the wise sage Bill Wurtz "you can make a religion out of this!"

After all, chosen few, returned from death... glowing and more powerful then before? Immortal? It's a pretty reasonable conclusion to come too. They are clearly Gods Touched. Some sacred task they must complete.

It would likely even shape the ghosts of the region themselves. After all, they TOO, would believe they were chosen for some Important Religious Task. Be it study or collecting rocks. To what end? Unknown. Who are they to question The Gods?

But! Oh happy day! The old tyrant is no more! A chosen Hero! They go to greet him! Honor him, as you do. Traditional gifts and ballads. Maybe some sacred rocks. A fancy hat. But? Oh? The Champion is wounded! Gasp! Still? But the fight with Pariah happened-

And then they are given Grave Warning(tm). Don't go to Earth. Heretics attacking people. KILLING souls! Trying to KILL the king of all the Infinite! He is somber because his living parents were hurt. Preventing the END OF ALL THINGS!!!??

WHAT!?

These "People In White" tried to EXPLODE the very FABRIC of all realities!? Several of them faint. Truely, these Fentons MUST be chosen by the Gods! Heros. Legends. Such bravery in the face of such HORRORS. Please, let them be brought to their Living counterparts! The hospitals are quite good!

And you know what? Fuck it. Danny will take that. Because his Mom n Dad got hurt. BAD.

They learned he was Phantom at probably the SINGLE worst time imaginable and still chose HIM. Chose THEM. The GIW were coming for him. Gonna hurt Jazz. And his parents told them, with fire and blood, it'd be a cold day in hell before they let them so much as TRY it.

They BLEW UP their own life's work. Went literally scorched earth. And now? They're not doing so good.

Because the Zone isn't made for the living. No food, no water, and no real human-safe medical supplies. They've run out. Danny will take what he can get. He'd even go to Vlad but... his Portal's gone too. And the Buzzards said he looked... spirally. Very... "suicide runs until everything BURNS".

So, yeah. No one's doing so great.

Alien planet it is.

They are greeted with fanfare and respect. The best medical teams on the PLANET. The King and his family is there, to welcome him. It's... it's beautiful. Hardly some perfect utopia, but the air is lite. Art everywhere. The stars vivid and so easy to see, at night.

The King kinda reminds him of Mr. Lancer to be honest. Balding and a bit round around the middle, stern but endlessly fair about it, wants people to do their best and succeed in life. Maybe that's why Danny finds himself opening up. Because... because here is a real, honest to God, KING king.

Somebody who was actually TRAINED to do all this King stuff.

Unlike Danny.

And Danny? He's scared. People expect him to Lead now. To know what he's doing. To somehow just... suddenly KNOW how to do all these things he's never even heard about. He only barely just died. Has BARELY been keeping everybody safe.

BARELY stopped Pariah.

He doesn't know what to do. But he pours his guts out. All the things that have bottled up. And King Not-Lancer listens. Somber and thoughtful. There is little, if anything he can TRUELY do to help. But... there ARE things he can do. Lessons on statescraft, while he's here, for one.

As for the other? Well, as King, he does have the local Lantern's Call Sign. Not to be used lightly, mind you. But what Danny describes? And from what the Sacred Ones have reported? THAT must be reported to Oa. He can show Danny how to do that.

(He does)

[The Lanterns of Earth get a VERY exciting call from Oa. Are every different shade of pissed. But? Whoops! Looks like they ACCIDENTALLY put the Watchtower into a complete Quarantine! Well, dang. Guess we're all stuck here for two weeks!

Reset it? *sound of smashing computer terminal* Yeah, don't think that's gonna work! :)

WHO WANTS TO PLAY 20 QUESTIONS?? We'll start! :) Who here has heard of an organization called, and I quote, The Ghost Investigation Ward? :) ]

@hdgnj @ailithnight @nerdpoe @the-witchhunter

[neroushalvaus]

Tumblr in the 60s – deleted posts

Some people requested a sequel to this post so I thought I'd post these drafts that didn't make it to the original. Maybe doing more at some point if the inspiration hits me but I hope these bring you some joy.

🚀 starrfleet Follow

HEY GUYS!! We're buying The Beatles so John and Paul can finally get together!! Who's in

🎹 nixonsafascist Follow

Call that... Beatles for Sale

🚀 starrfleet Follow

Dude this is serious. We want to free them. Why is homophobia so very funny to you?

🎶 mclennstarrison Follow

Didn't The Beatles start managing themselves after Mr Epstein died? So you plan to buy them... From themselves?

🚀 starrfleet Follow

Oh so the george harrison vampire mpreg blog is going to preach to us now.

92 notes

📻 lesbianbobdylan Follow

"Let men have short hair!!" "It's okay to not agree with the civil rights folk" "Don't let tumblr tell you that serving your country is bad" You are all so chronically online and convinced your little hippie bubble represents the world that you have the worst takes. Conservatism is alive and well, us hippies are the fucking minority. The outside world is perfectly okay with all the anti-mlk short-haired men who are happily getting drafted. You are not counterculture.

15,5 t. notes

☁️ ankin-vaimo Follow

Tumblr is so US/UK centric. Scrolling through this site you'd think there were no other tv shows than star trek and no other bands than the monkees and that the stonewall riots were the only meaningful political activism that has ever happened. There's so much great culture elsewhere. I bet you have never even heard of Tapani Kansa.

🇻🇳 shirellesofficial

#shhh don't tell Tumblr that other countries exist #they couldn't even admit Please Mr. Postman was originated by black women (tags via @marvelettesofficial)

peer reviewed tags

#sorry for going through your tumblr marvelettesofficial #you're just so funny #hope i'm not annoying you

54 notes

🌼 andpeoplesaywebeatlearound Follow

People really like to pretend us Beatles girlies hate Y*ko for being asian and a woman like she didn't literally make John cheat on his wife and leave his young son

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians Follow

don't talk like us beatles girlies are all the same, i personally want to fuck her on a canvas while we're both covered in menstrual blood, creating modern art by making love

✝️ jesusrevolution Follow

Op is this you? ↓

🎶 mclennstarrison Follow

Also like, "made John cheat on his wife and leave his young son", did John himself have nothing to do with that decision or..?

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians Follow

do you guys think she and john do mommy play

🎶 mclennstarrison Follow

I appreciate the input @prostitutesandlesbians but we're trying to call the op out for being a racist misogynist

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians Follow

sorry

346 notes

🤪 thekinkykinks Follow

Why is there even discourse about this... Yeah, the folks at Stonewall could have been more respectful towards the police officers who were just doing their jobs, but why are we acting like throwing some pennies at the police officers and calling them "Lily Law" is the worst type of oppression

🥿 trustnobutch Follow

You know what? No. Fuck you. I'm tired of you all talking about these people like they were your poor little meow meows. Have you read about this at all? The raid did not happen because the police "hates gay people wah wah". Stonewall Inn was run by the mob. The. Fucking. Mob. Would you rather have the police not protecting us from criminals, huh??? And the rioters were nothing but a bunch of attention seekers. I heard that a guy from the fucking Mattachine Society phoned newspapers and took pictures of the riot. I'm so disappointed, that was the only gay group that seemed to care about looking respectable in the eyes of the heterosexuals. People who were there made us all look bad and set our movement back like 50 years. Fuck you for supporting them.

🍊 kissmemissoklaholma Follow

Yeah. I heard someone threw a brick.

✌ draftdodgerdyke

??? Nobody threw bricks, where the fuck do you get your information ??

#they should have tho #chilling at the stockholm airport finding the weirdest takes

998 notes

🧸 teddyboyfemme Follow

i'm sharing a joint with this cute ass butch with the cutest curliest hair ever guyyyyssss I think i'm falling in love

🧸 teddyboyfemme Follow

she plays the harmonica for me i want to fuck her to the mattress

🧸 teddyboyfemme Follow

i don't have any idea what she's singing about but i think she likes the rolling stones too, we have so much in commonnnn

🧸 teddyboyfemme Follow

So it turns out that was Bob Dylan.

70,9 t. notes

[spidernuggets]

Jason Todd x Bitchy!Reader

Note: It's note really "bitchy" per se, but idrk what else to put

You didn't think you were THAT mean of a person. You were only mean when you needed to be. You know, standing up for your friends, standing up for yourself. But sometimes, you think, is it too much?

You were never good with expressing your own emotions. Every time someone gave you a gift, you'd reply with an awkward, muttered "aw.. thanks, it's great." And you'd genuinely love it, but you're just too enclosed to express your gratitude.

Or when you get compliments from your friends, you telk them to shut up and go away. Your friends know you, luckily. They know you appreciate the compliment based on the flushed look on your face when they call you cool or pretty.

But when you met Jason Todd, your friends noticed how happy you looked. They knew you had an on and off relationship with your parents, causing you to act better than everyone else when really you feel like the worst person in the world. Luckily, your friends are supportive of you, and no doubt, did they get excited over your new love interest.

"You know you're not subtle, Y/n," your friend once said to you. "Every time Jason comes by to pick you up or something, your pupils form heart shapes."

You rolled your eyes at the memory, walking into Jason's apartment.

"Hey, Jay," you say, walking up behind the couch, wrapping your arms around your boyfriend's shoulders and placing a loving smooch against his cheek.

He smiles, his heart getting warm and mushy from the soft affection.

"Hi, babe. I... I got something for ya," he quietly says, reaching for something in the pocket of his sweatpants.

You perched over his shoulder, trying to see what he got.

He pulls out a small black box, and upon opening, it reveals a shiny, sliver necklace with a heart charm. "It's uh..." Jason awkwardly scratches the back of his neck as his cheeks heat up and pink flushes across his face. "It's for the last time you gifted me that switchblade."

Jason wasn't the most confident in gift giving, but the fact that he tried made your heart swell. The hard part was trying to express that feeling.

"Oh.. it's really pretty, Jay. Thanks.." In your language, it translated to 'Oh my god, it's gorgeous, I want to marry you, you're the absolute love of my life'

At this point in your relationship, Jason was well aware of your shallow reactions, but knew that you appreciated the things he offered to you, so he never took your awkward reactions to heart.

Your heart was racing, but you kept thay information to yourself, so you kissed the ruffles of his hair and thanked him again.

You told him you were going to change into your pjs (his hoodie), so you speed walked to your shared room, and quickly shut the door behind you.

Your face was so warm, and you wasted no time putting the necklace on. You held the charm close to your chest, mentally screaming and kicking your feet at the gift and changed into a comfier shirt and sweatpants along with Jason's hoodie.

You were ready to go out to spend some more time with Jason, but he came into the room in a rush.

"Hey, sugar, I got some last-minute work that I got called in for," he kissed your forhead before walking past you, grabbing a bag from the closet.

"I'll won't be back until late, so don't stay up, okay? Make sure to get some sleep, sweetness."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," you mutter as he sped out the door.

You sighed and laid on your bed, staring at the cracked ceiling. This wasn't the first time Jason had sped out for a last-minute call into work. It was probably due to his little secret life he's hiding from you.

You wanted to tell him that you knew about his Red Hood alter ego, but you wanted to let him tell you himself when he was ready.

But this dash out the door has become so recent, him leaving even outside his usual schedules that you observed, you're beginning to think that..

What if he's leaving just to get some space from you?

It's a ridiculous thought, but you honestly wouldn't blame him. You agreed with the idea that your lack of words of affection and gratefulness, and attitude could eventually get exhausting.

Another memory with your friends flickered in your head.

"Does your boyfriend ever question how you act?"

A new person was introduced to your friend group. They weren't really aware of why you acted like you did.

"What do you mean?" You sharply replied.

They laugh. "I mean.. you're not the most.. expressive person, Y/n." They reply with a grin. You never like this person. Luckily, they were kicked out of the group shortly.

"Dude-" Your actual friend tried to cut in.

"Ha," you chimed. "Well, it's kind of none of your god damn business." You snarled.

They held their hands up in sarcastic defence. "Calm down. I'm just saying. Show some smiles and gratitude once in a while."

You were close to punching them right in the face before the rest of your friends told them to piss off.

But maybe they're right. Jason deserves more than a weak thanks. He needed more affection, more smiles, and more love. He definitely needs it after every shift from work.

Your relationship might be on the line if you don't up your game.

So early the next morning, you awoke to Jason's arm loosely around your waist. You smiled at his light, tired snores, kissing his chin lightly before rolling away from his warmth and comfort. You tucked him back into the blanket before heading to the kitchen.

It's been almost an hour before you heard Jason's heavy padding for footsteps coming into the kitchen.

"N/n?" He groggily calls out, rubbing his eyes, and the sight was so fucking adorable.

"Morning, Jay Jay!" You excalimed, mentally cringing at the extra sweetness. "Want some breakfast?" You brightly smiled, plating the final portion of scrambled eggs and placing it onto the table, along with the bacon, pancakes, toast, and juice laid on the table.

"Wow, this is a lot. What's the occation?" He asks confused, still tired from waking up.

"What? Can I not spoil you, handsome?" Your stomach churned from your newfound personality, which also cause Jason eyebrow to raise in question.

"I guess?" He said, unsure from your more cheerful mood. "You okay?" He carefully asked.

"More than okay, now that you're awake, baby," you walked up to him, placing a lingering kiss to his lips.

His brows furrowed. "Baby? That's new." He commented before sitting at the table. He knew that the cheesy nicknames were his department. For you, it was either Jay or a joke nickname that had some significance that only the two of you knew the context behind, like troublemaker or stubborn.

"Did you sleep well? How was work last night?" Another development. Needing to know how he was after every activity.

"It.. Good. It was good. You sure you're okay?" There was nothing wrong with the questions you asked. It was just new to him. And the seemingly forced smiles that looked like they were making your cheeks hurt were new, too.

Your smile faltered. "Yeah... why d'you ask?"

He put his utensils down. "It's just new. It's not bad, but.. it seems kind of unnatural for you." He calmly says. Then slowly questions, "Can I ask what brought it on?"

"I..." You hiccuped. All you thought since last night was the thought of Jason leaving you because you can't express your emotions as well as most others.

You didn't even notice the light tears rolling down your face.

"Hey, hey, sweet thing, what's the matter?" He quickly asks with worry, both his hands cupping your cheeks and wiping away your tears.

"Don't leave, please.." you whimper.

His face softens. "What? Babe, why would you ever think that?" Your tears are wiped away, but he continues to caress your face.

"I- I thought you were getting tired of me.. I thought I needed to- to be more caring or- or emotional, devoted? I don't know.." You stammered, looking down at his knees, avoiding his attempts to look in your sad eyes.

Oh.

"Oh, my sweetness, I'd never get tired of you. I'm so crazy for you. You don't even know."

"You're always gone.." You pathetically whine.

Jason's hands move away from your face, then quickly occupied to your hands. "Please look at me, Y/n?"

He asked so nicely. You couldn't possibly deny his request. So you look up to share his gaze.

He sighs and starts his long explanation of his occupation as Red Hood. You only knew about the Red Hood part. But he revealed to you everything. From when he was brought in by Batman, he became Robin, died, all the nitty gritty.

And he ended it by revealing he was Red Hood.

You sniffled. "I know." You say quietly.

"What?" He asked dumbfounded.

You could only let out a light giggle. "I already know your Red Hood. You accidently left your thigh holsters in the closet."

And hearing your faint laugh made Jason smile. "Well, why didn't you tell me, N/n?"

"Wanted you to tell me when you were ready," you shrugged. "So.. you're not gonna leave?"

He laughs. "My sweet thing, I love you so much for you."

Your eyes slightly widen. "You love me?"

"You've no idea," he smiles, holding your chin, pulling you in for a passionate kiss.

"Mm, whatever," you mutter between his lips. Instantly, he knew that meant that you loved him too.

"That's my darling."

[daemour]

Pairing: Yunho x f! yn, mentioned possible woosan

Word Count: 4002

Warnings: cursing, kissing

Genre: Angst, fluff, e2l, school setting (unspecified), E for everyone

Summary: Getting flowers from a secret admirer was the highlight of your week. But with a certain blonde student disrupting your every day, things may change.

Hello @hotteoki <3 I am your secret admirer! It was great getting to know you and I hope you enjoy this! It kinda got away from me, and I do have a bonus woosan drabble that connect to this so i hope you enjoy it! and can you figure out who was giving the flowers?

-

“Ooh, look how popular you are, (Y/N), you got flowers again!”

Your peace of mind is shattered when you hear your worst enemy, Jeong Yunho walk by and tease you about your secret admirer. “Just because you’re going to die a lonely old geezer doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy my flowers, Jeong,” you snap at him before returning your gaze to the bouquet of wildflowers lying on your desk. Every Monday, an assortment of flowers would be waiting for you, and every Monday Yunho teases you about it incessantly.

Yunho cackles, leaning forward (on your desk, might you add) and poking at the flowers. “What’d you get this time? White and purple lilacs? Cute. This person must really like you, (Y/N)...I feel sorry for them.” He punctuates each word with another poke and you close your eyes, exasperated.

“Jeong Yunho, get back in your seat before I smack you,” you threaten, but it does nothing to intimidate your personal pain in the ass. All he does is laugh and raise his hands in mock surrender.

“Hey man, I’m just saying. You’re so mean to me already, how would you be if they came out and told you.”

You blink at him, barely processing his words before your mouth drops open and you get ready to retort when the teacher comes in and you’re forced to sit down with a polite smile.

“Mr Jeong, please take a seat so we may begin our lesson,” your teacher calls out and Yunho shoots you a smile that you want to wipe off his face before taking his seat.

-

“I don’t understand what he has got against me,” you complain to your friends as soon as you sit at your lunch table. “Ever since we went into college he’s made it his life’s mission to annoy me. I don’t think we ever interacted with each other in middle school. Or even high school! I know he’s my neighbour or whatever, but he could stand to be nicer.”

Wooyoung slurps on his banana milk, not even caring about your issues, but Seonghwa leans forward, always invested in the gossip. Even if he’s heard the same thing from you dozens of times. “Maybe he likes you?”

You scoff loudly at the suggestion. “Ew, no.” You shake your head and shut down that idea. “Even if he did, that’s no way to get me to like you back! What, I fall into his arms? ‘Oh, Yunho, thanks for making fun of me and putting me down at any moment you get!’ Yeah, that’ll work.”

You roll your eyes so harshly you think they might pop out of your head and Wooyoung finally looks up. “Have you told him to stop?” You open your mouth to object but your friend cuts in again. “Or do you just fight him back and keep playing his game?”

You blink owlishly before sighing and leaning back in your chair. “You know, sometimes you can be pretty smart.”

Wooyoung nods happily before it hits him and his head snaps toward you. “Sometimes?”

-

Your usual bouquet awaits you when you arrive at school the following Monday. This week it’s white lilies and you stop to breathe in the fresh scent. But to your surprise, something else is sitting on your desk. A packet of mentos sits plain on the desk and you stare at it for a few unblinking moments.

“Do you like it?” You jump at Yunho’s voice suddenly appearing from behind you.

Of course. You whirl around and point at the offender. “Can’t you leave me alone? I don’t know what I’ve done to make you hate me, but really, dude. What lengths are you going to go to? How did you even find out my least favourite candy? Why do you keep bothering me day after day?”

Yunho stares at you, his eyes wide and you almost feel bad. Almost. But you shake away these unwanted thoughts and narrow your eyes. Wooyoung was right—you let the teasing go on for far too long. “Just leave me alone,” you sigh and plop down in your seat and bury your head in your arms, no longer wanting to see your biggest tormenter. (And yes, you are exaggerating.)

Yunho mumbles something you can’t quite hear but you’re unbothered by it and just steadily ignore him. There’s another pause before you hear him walk away and your shoulders relax. But even so, you can’t help but feel guilt for how you snapped at Yunho. Maybe he really didn’t know you were feeling annoyed.

But no, you can’t bend like that. He’s been bothering you for a good part of the school year and even if he thought you were okay with it, surely he should’ve at least gotten to know you before jumping into teasing you.

You have more important things to worry about anyway, such as your secret admirer. Every time you see a new bouquet on the desk, your heart rate spikes and you can’t stop a smile from growing on your face.

But, the more you think about it, the more worried you are about what the outcome of this would be.

-

And lately, not just flowers have been appearing on your desk. Sometimes, there’s a phone charm, maybe a strawberry milk or two, always something extra alongside it. It’s only made you more curious about your secret admirer, and you can’t stop talking about it to your friends.

In your quest, you’ve narrowed it down to two people, Choi Jongho and Kang Yeosang. Both are in your grade, although you don’t talk to them very often. You just know they’re on the quieter side so would be more likely to prefer secret gifts. Plus, you’ve had projects with both of them so they are at least connected to you in some way.

“Are you just going to spend your lunch doing this?” Wooyoung barges into your empty homeroom during lunch, carrying his lunch as well as a sandwich from the cafeteria for you. He pulls a chair in front of you and sits. “You gotta at least eat. Just because Hwa is sick doesn’t mean I’m gonna feed you in his place.”

You laugh, looking up at him and taking the sandwich. “Aren’t you doing that right now though?” You dodge his swat, laughing as you push aside your gifts of the day. “Anyways, yes. I have my guesses narrowed down, but even if they’re both wrong is just fun to me,” you shrug.

Wooyoung hums, leaning forward to poke at the ring pop. “Can I eat this?”

You can’t help but snort, nodding. “Go ahead. But, you know, I wonder if they’d ever come forward. All I get are gifts and I don’t know if they’d ever tell me how they feel. That's why I keep guessing. I want to know.”

A sigh escapes Wooyoung’s mouth, and he cocks his head. “But (Y/N), what if they don’t want to be known? I mean, maybe they’d just like to be anonymous and just it die after graduation?”

You shrug, meeting his eyes. “I just wouldn’t want to live my life not knowing. Of course it can be scary to confess, but missing that chance would be worse, wouldn’t it? I wouldn’t ever reject them meanly if they turn out to be someone I wouldn’t like. Hell, my two guesses I don’t know if I’d want to date.”

Wooyoung nods, relaxing in his chair. “No, that makes sense. It’s better to get a solid answer than not. Do you think they’ll ever reveal it?”

Yet again, you shrug. “I really don’t know. I would understand if they don’t, but I hope they do.”

Wooyoung opens his mouth to say something else, but before he can, the door to the classroom opens and an unfortunately familiar head of hair pokes through. “What are you doing here, Jeong?” you snap, eyes narrowing. “Can’t even have lunch in peace now?”

A choked sound escapes Yunho’s throat and he looks ready to run back out and pretend it never happened, but he swallows it back and steps into the classroom. “I want to talk to you, (Y/N). I promise it’s nothing bad. Will you hear me out?”

You narrow your eyes and beckon him closer. “Fine. What is it?”

His eyes flick to Wooyoung, who leans back with a face of disapproval. “You can say it in front of me too,” he states, his expression unchanging.

At that moment, you really appreciate Wooyoung. Although he’s the one who told you to set a boundary with Yunho instead of letting him have his fun, he’ll still have your back. Yunho glances at you but you make no move to correct Wooyoung so he sighs and steps fully into the room.

“It’s about the gifts. And no, it’s not a joke,” Yunho quickly adds when he sees your face shift to a deeper frown. “Uh. I was just passing by when I heard you talking to Wooyoung and I figured I should tell you now.”

A sinking feeling starts to grow in your stomach. “No–”

Wooyoung starts to look genuinely regretful that he decided to stay, and you can’t blame him one bit. “It is me,” Yunho confirms. “I wasn’t the flowers.”

You squeeze your eyes shut. “You think that helps, Jeong?” You let out an exasperated sigh and a shake of your head. “You’ve been making my life here difficult for the better part of a year and I finally tell you off. And you think adding to my confusion on the secret admirer is going to help? You must be crazy.”

Yunho shakes his head frantically. “No, it’s not just that. Of course, I wanted to show I was sorry but there’s another reason. I…uh. Do I really have to say it in front of Wooyoung?”

You frown, eyes flicking back and forth between them before you sigh and concede. “Wooyoung, could you give him some privacy?”

With a nod and a face of pure happiness at not having to witness what would be awkward for him, Wooyoung practically runs out of the classroom, leaving everything but the sandwich he had brought for you. “What did you want to say, Jeong?”

“I like you, (Y/N).”

Before his words settle fully your head’s already a mess. “What?” You can’t get a full sentence out, just blinking at your classmate, whose ears seem to be turning red. “No, this is another prank, right? You’ve decided that I can’t just have a good time with my friends.”

Yunho steps forward, pleading with his eyes but you scoot back in your chair. “(Y/N), please. I’m being serious. I wouldn’t joke about that.”

“You wouldn’t?” You scoff, even though it sounds a bit wet. “Tell me, why would I believe that? Even if you had left me alone, that doesn’t erase everything else you did to me. You don’t act with sincerity, Yunho. Go away like I told you to weeks ago.”

Yunho frowns and doesn’t go away, only coming even closer. “How can I make it up to you?”

“You can make it up to me by leaving me alone. You can’t expect me to like you after bothering me so much, really now, Yunho.” You shake your head again, standing up and gathering your stuff, pointedly leaving the gifts he had been giving you on the desk. “I should go find Wooyoung now.”

And before Yunho can say anything you leave him standing in the middle of the class as you wander through the halls hoping to pass the time before your next class (thankfully not with him).

-

“Can you believe he did that?” You groan, pressing your face against Seonghwa’s shoulder as Wooyoung awkwardly pats your back. After successfully avoiding Yunho for the next week, you had to call an emergency movie night with your friends to figure out what to do.

“Well, I hate to say it, but I told you–” Seonghwa cuts off his jibe when you glare at him. “Look, (Y/N), you don’t have to accept him or even be friends. But maybe you could just let him try and redeem himself. He seems genuinely sorry. And if you do that and then still tell him no, maybe then you could feel less conflicted about it.”

“I don’t know if you should do that,” Wooyoung cuts in.

Both you and Seonghwa turn to face him with confused looks. Out of the three of you, Wooyoung was the most realistic when it came to Yunho. Seonghwa wanted it to end up like a storybook romance, while you just wanted to never speak to Yunho ever again. Wooyoung had always been the voice of reason that maybe Yunho just didn’t mean it with malice and was the one to tell you to set a boundary with Yunho in the first place.

“Why not?” Seonghwa frowns, shifting so that he can face the two of you properly. “Out of us all, you’re probably the closest to him since you know his friend, San.”

Wooyoung snorts, waving his hands. “Just because I’m friends with San doesn’t mean I’m friends with Yunho. I just think if (Y/N) doesn’t want to have anything to do with Yunho, then that’s that.” He shrugs, leaning over to grab a handful of popcorn but Seonghwa isn’t letting it go.

“But I feel like it would be good for Yunho to learn how to properly apologise,” Seonghwa argues again. “He shouldn’t expect you to fall for him after he confesses right after an apology.”

You bite your lip and look at your hands clasped on your lap. Both of your friends have a good point, and to be honest, before Yunho had started bothering you, you didn’t hate him. In fact, every so often you had thought about inviting him to hang out with the three of you. You sigh again. “I’ll try. Just till the end of the school year, okay? When I see him with his friends he seems like a genuinely nice guy. Plus, wouldn’t it just make things awkward with you and San, Woo? San is one of Yunho’s closest friends after all.”

Wooyoung shrugs, still clearly unhappy but not willing to fight any longer. “What’s the worst thing that can happen? Yunho’s a cool guy, so I do hope he doesn’t screw it up.”

Seonghwa laughs. “Who knows? Maybe in the end, they’ll fall in love and get married and I’ll be the best man..”

You laugh and shove at him. “In your dreams. You just want to be in the wedding party.”

Seonghwa shrugs, leaning over to rustle your hair. “We all know it's true.”

-

“Oh, hi, Yunho.”

You didn't even have to find the tall blond this time. He's waiting by your locker. How did he even find out the number? You have no idea, and you’re not too sure you want to know.

“(Y/N), can I say something?” He holds out a bag with all the gifts you had left behind the previous week. “And you can honestly keep these. I don't like these candies anyway.”

“Uh. Sure? Thanks.” You take the plastic bag from his outstretched hands with only a little hesitation. “What's up?”

Yunho blinks, surprised at your willingness to listen, although he quickly composes himself. “Uh. My friend, San, told me I should apologise sincerely, not just saying sorry and then confessing.”

You can't help but smile at that—San and Seonghwa would probably make good friends. “Well, that would be appreciated,” you joke and Yunho’s body relaxes at your short laugh. “I can't fall in love if you go from bullying to loving.”

Both of you realise at the same moment how badly timed that joke was, but Yunho gracefully ignores that. “Would…would you like to go to the library with me after school today to work on finals?” Yunho almost whispers, as if he’s scared you would reject him. And at any time before today, you probably would’ve. But this time, you offer a small, unsure smile.

“Sure.”

And although your brain is screaming at you, your heart is telling you that this is not a mistake.

-

As much as you hate to admit it, you’ve grown close to Jeong Yunho. and his dumb smile. His jokes that somehow always make you laugh and also want to choke him out sometimes. Even your friend group has warmed up to him. Seonghwa still teases you in private about being with Yunho, but Wooyoung is just as friendly as ever and…also seems to be joining in with Seonghwa on the teasing. You’re not quite sure what to make of it.

But one problem still persists—the question of your secret admirer. The flowers have dwindled, although they’re still showing up. It’s almost finals week and you’re stressing out of your mind over the exams, and sometimes you can’t help but wonder to yourself if the person’s crush on you is dwindling. And why don’t you feel bad about it?

At first, you thought you liked them, whoever they are. You’d smile every time you see the flowers and you were genuinely relieved that your secret admirer wasn’t Yunho. But these days, you look at Yunho, and you wonder what would’ve happened if you had said yes to his confession. Would he hold you gently the way he holds your weekly bouquet to admire it?

“Hello? Earth to (Y/N)?” Wooyoung’s voice cuts through your thoughts, his hand waving in front of your face.

“Ah– Sorry, Wooyoung. What’s up?”

“No, no, you seem distracted.” Wooyoung plops down in front of you, leaning onto your desk and looking up at you with his brows furrowed just slightly. “Is something wrong?”

You shrug. “It’s just that…I’m confused.” You sigh from your bones, propping your head up with your head. “I couldn’t stand Yunho for such a long time, and yet, these days I can’t seem to get enough of him. I look at him and I’m fond. I’m not looking at him and I’m fond. But what about my secret admirer? They’ve been constantly there for me just by giving me flowers. It’s always perked me up. But I don’t think I like them the way they want me to…the way I want to.”

Wooyoong frowns. “What do you mean, the way you want to? You can’t help it if you don’t have feelings for them. And sure, maybe you appreciate them, but it doesn’t mean you have to like them back. It’s not like you’re dating. Hell, you don’t even know who they are. Maybe they won’t give a shit, or maybe they’ll be disappointed but what can they do if they never told you?” He shrugs. “If you like Yunho, just go for it. He’s a nice guy, outside of how he treated you. And a little birdie may have told me that he still likes you.”

You nod, defeated and yet relieved. “That’s true. Hey, Wooyoung.” Your close friend cocks his head, looking at you with wide eyes. “Thank you for your advice. I do appreciate you keeping my head out of my ass and in line. I know I don’t say it enough to you and Seonghwa, but you guys are my closest friends and I love you guys.”

Wooyoung’s smile softens as he leans in to give you a warm hug. “Can’t leave you floundering by yourself, dumbass.”

You slap Wooyoung on the shoulder but don’t break the hug. “Fuck off, idiot. I hope you stub your toe today.” You pause. “Did Yunho really tell San he still likes me?”

-

You can’t stop pacing the park in front of the school. You asked Yunho to meet you there after the last day of classes, hoping to ask him out, but now you’re starting to regret it. What if Wooyoung and San were mistaken and Yunho no longer likes you? What if he just laughs in your face and tells you it was a farce for a last prank before your graduation? You bring your thumb up to your mouth, biting on the nail as you debate between just playing it off as wanting to go to the arcade, or whether you should suck it up and tell Yunho. Or you just ditch him here and go home and eat a big tub of ice cream. The choice is yours.

You’re about three steps into your last plan of leaving when a warm hand grasps your wrist. “Hey, sorry it took me so long,” a familiar low voice hums. “San needed to talk to me. Hey, did you know–”

“Can I ask you–”

The two of you pause before giggling at the cliche interruption. “You go first,” you offer. “I want to hear the tea.” You wriggle your eyebrows at Yunho, making your friend snort.

“Did you know San likes Wooyoung?”

You blink for a moment before a grin breaks out on your face. “Oh, really? That’s so cute! I don’t know San well, but I know Wooyoung’s pretty fond of him. Hopefully it works out for them!” You’re pretty sure you’re practically sparkling from hearing about this. Wooyoung has always been the single one in your friend group—Seonghwa’s dating this one girl from a different area and they’ve been happy for years, and you’ve had on-and-off partners through the years. It would be nice if he finally liked someone.

Yunho nods, pleased. “I hope so too. They would be cute together. Anyways, what did you want to ask me?”

Ah. You’re pretty sure you’re looking a little sick from how Yunho’s barely hiding his concern behind his eyes. “Uh. So. I changed my mind. See you at graduation!” And hopefully never again.

But before you can back out like a coward and never face Yunho again, you catch a twinkle in his eyes and a knowing smile and you immediately have a sinking feeling in your gut. If your fears are confirmed, you’ll make sure to write a nice eulogy for your friend. “...What did Wooyoung tell San and what did San tell you?”

Yunho chuckles. “Same as what San told Wooyoung, who told you.” His smile somehow grows even larger. “Honestly, the only reason I haven’t killed San yet is because I’d like to see him and Wooyoung get together.”

Your eyes narrow. “Well, I’m not sparing Wooyoung that same courtesy. I sure hope San’s able to keep Wooyoung alive.” You turn away, ready to find Wooyoung to beat him up but the grip that you forgot Yunho had on your wrist tightens and he tucks you into a back hug, his other arm wrapping around your waist.

It feels like time stops as you can hardly breathe when Yunho’s chin rests on your shoulder. “You can fight Wooyoung later, but I think something is slightly more important than that.” And before you can say anything, Yunho spins you around and presses a quick kiss to the corner of your mouth.

Now it really feels like time has stopped for you, but all you can do is stare up at him with your face slowly heating up until you feel you may melt. “Uh,” is all you manage to eloquently say, but Yunho just smiles, waiting for you to gather your thoughts while looking at you softly. “Uh. I think that slightly is a bit of an understatement.”

Yunho bursts out laughing at your admission, leaning in again until his nose brushes against yours. “There’s the (Y/N) I know and love. May I kiss you again?”

You’re pretty sure he can feel the heat radiating off your face, but you can’t bring yourself to care as you nod before whispering out a ‘yes’. And, before you can even blink, his plush lips are on yours again. It feels like a daydream, but as your hands come up to cup Yunho’s face, you smile into the kiss and feel at home in his arms.

[nights-legacy]

What Agreement?! - Bakugou x Reader

Main Masterlist ~ MHA Masterlist ~ #2

I hope you like this!

Requested by @simply-trash5

1722 Words

+ You and Bakugou had been close ever since 1st year. After graduation, you two stayed close. From working at the same agency to being with each other's go for almost everything. Save for the few things he only shares with Deku and Kirishima. You thought from how personal and soft he sometimes acted with you, that he shared your feelings for him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N's POV

I sighed as the train ride seemed to take forever. I could hear the whispers and clicks of people's phones from both sides of me. I ignored it, having got used to it over the past couple of years. Finally the train made it to the station and I quickly got off while dialing my phone.

"Hello?" Mina chirped on the other end.

"Hey Mina. Sorry I'm late. I'm just a few blocks away so I'll be there in a few minutes.

"Great! I was starting to wonder. But Y/N, to have is something you should know. Kat..." The sound of some fangirls coming towards me caught my attention.

"Damn. I thought they were going to leave me alone. You'll have to tell me later Mina. I'll be there in a few minutes." I hung up the phone.

After about 10 minutes, I was able to slip away to get to the party. I walked a few blocks to the restaurant. I was greeted first by Sero outside who was out for a smoke. I found Mina next who as soon as she saw me, she looked panicked a bit.

"What's wrong Mina? You look like you've seen the worst thing in the world." I chuckled. "Where's Bakugou? You mentioned him."

"Not the worst for me but for you maybe." I gave her an amused but curious look.

"Okay now you have to tell me." We walked into the actual room for our party.

"Well let's just say, um... Katsuki..." I listened to her until Katsuki's voice caught my attention. I quickly zeroed in on him, only for my stomach to drop by what I saw. Katsuki was standing across the room next to Kirishima. Kirishima wasn't the deal, it was Katsuki's arm around some girl I've never seen before, shoulders. "Yeah that."

"He has a... date?"

"Yeah. I tried to warn you on the phone. I'm sorry."

"I, um... That's fine." I stuttered.

"Y/N?" Katsuki looked over at that moment and saw me. He waved me over.

"I'll talk to you later, Mina." I walked over to the three standing there. Kirishima and I swapped greetings before he gave me a sympathetic smile and walked away.

"Y/N. This is Maya. My girlfriend. Maya,  this my best friend Y/N."

"Nice to meet you." I shook her hand. "Wow Kats. A girlfriend. I had no idea."

"Yeah. We wanted to keep it on the down low from everyone until we got more comfortable With each other."

"Oh that makes sense. Especially with our crazy friend group." I forced a chuckle. Plus, to prove my point Denki screamed something across the room before the lights flickered.

"Spark plug..." Kat muttered. Maya giggled and set her hand on Kat's chest. My throat closed off at seeing how close they were. Kat still didn't like us touching him outside a high five, a shoulder touch, or back slap even after all these years.

"Well, I'm going to greet a few of the others. It was nice meeting you Maya."

"It was nice meeting you too!" She said sweetly. I smiled and walked away. I could feel my eyes stinging as I walked towards a blurring figure with purple hair.

"Hey there Stormy." Shinso greeted me softly. I wiped my eyes. I looked up and he gave me a sad smile. 

"Hi." I greeted. 

"Come here." He held out his arm. I settled into his side and he hugged me tight. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It was bound to happen."

"Yeah. But we all thought it would be with you." He said softly. "Rooting for it actually." 

"Yeah. Sorry to disappoint."

~

As the weeks went by, Kat invited me out to hang with him in Maya. I went most of the time but eventually I started to distance myself from him. Kats kept calling to hang out but I made every excuse to say no. I even started to pair up more with other heroes for shifts.

"Okay. I'm heading out for the day." I said as I packed up my stuff. I stood up from my desk and grabbed my bag.

"See ya later." Sero said while saving over his shoulder. "Oh by the way. Katsuki is getting real antsy about why you've been avoiding him."

"I haven't been avoiding him. I've been avoiding ... them, together." I admitted. He sighed and turned to me.

"Y/N, babe. I know seeing him with someone hurt but he is still my best friend. You keep acting like this, you're going to hurt him."

"I know." I plopped down in my chair. "It just hurts seeing the man I'm in love with with someone else. I mean it was bound to happen but I didn't think... I mean, Kat never showed interest in dating much, ever."

"I know. It took us all by surprise. Even Deku."

"I just can't stand the sight of them being all lovey. It's like a knife to the heart thrice times over."

"Um... Y/N."

"And I'm so in love with him that I don't know if I can get past this."

"Y/N..."

"I can't help but love him, Sero." I said before looking up at him. He looked a little pale and gave me an apologetic smile. I gave him a confused look.

"You what?!" A familiar voice snapped from my right. I quickly looked to see Kat standing there with a confused glare.

"Why didn't you tell me?!" I panicked, looking at Sero.

"I tried!" I looked back at Kat and he stood there with his cams crossed.

"Kat."

"Explain." He said in a condescending tone. The tone made me a little upset. And hurt. I looked away and got up.

"I'm leaving." I walked towards the elevator.

"Oh no you don't." He snapped and followed. I rolled my eyes and covered him in fog so he couldn't follow.

Later that night, I was sitting on my couch watching some TV. There was a familiar knock on the door that made me freeze up. I looked at the foyer before getting up. I walked to the door and opened it.

"Really? Fog?" He said unimpressed.

"Worked didn't it." I said. He rolled my eyes. I went to close the door.

"Wait!" He put a hand on the door keeping it open.

"Kat, I can't do this right now."

"Y/N. Please let me in. We need to talk." He said quietly, trying to hide the fact that he was pleading.

"I don't want to." I started to close the door again.

"It wasn't real!" He shouted, panicked. I paused and reopened the door.

"What wasn't real?" He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. I finally noticed how disheveled he looked, like he had gotten dressed in a flurry and his hair was entirely out of place.

"The relationship with Maya." He said. I was silent for a minute.

"WHAT?!" I exclaimed. He bit his lip. "Get in here!"

"Okay." He stepped in and kicked off his shoes. We walked in farther.

"Explain!" I snapped.

"Maya and I made this little agreement."

"Agreement?"

"Yeah um."

"So you lied to everyone?" I said in disbelief

"Well, yeah." He said. "But..."

"Katsuki!" I scoffed. I was pissed at him. "Why would you do this?! This isn't like you. You don't lie!"

"I know but..." He rubbed the back of his neck.

"I just can't believe you would do this and..."

"Will you just listen to me?" He snapped. I looked at him only half surprised.

"Yeah, yeah." I nodded. He sat down.

"I did it because I thought it would make you jealous and if you had feelings for me, you would speak up or do something. When you didn't I figured you didn't have feelings for me." He sighed heavily and sat back on the couch. "But then I heard you today."

"Shit. Right." I muttered and hugged myself.

"Maya agreed to help me and I shouldn't have done it but I did. It hurt us both in the end." He let his head fall into his hands. I had never seen him act like this, so it must really be bothering him. I sat down next to him. "I nearly caused myself to nearly lose another best friend. Again."

"You haven't lost me." I said softly. He looked over at me.

"I haven't?" I could see the doubt hidden in his eyes.

"No. I wasn't going to leave you. I just needed time to get past the fact you were with someone else. As you probably heard me say to Sero, I'm in love with you and it hurt to see you with Maya." I admitted. "I had to face it sooner or later but I wasn't going anywhere."

"Oh. Good." We sat there in an awkward silence. I was looking down at my lap. "Hey, look at me."

"What?" I looked up at him. He took a big breath. Cupping my chin, he moved in closer.

"Tell me to stop and we can go back to being friends." He said. There was a beat of silence before I pulled him in the rest of the way by his shirt. The kiss was the complete opposite then you would think coming from Bakugou Katsuki. It was sweet and longing when I thought it would be, well rough and hard.

"We are not going back to being just friends." I said when I pulled away. He chuckled and slithered his arms around my hips, pulling me close. He pulled me into another more passionate kiss.

"Fuck no." He said breathlessly.

"I think we need to thank Maya majorly. We owe her big time." I chucked.

"Oh she benefited from the arrangement too." I lifted an eyebrow in confusion and curiosity.

"How so?"

"She was trying to make the girl she likes jealous too. Except, it worked in her favor." He huffed and did his trademark Bakugou pout. I giggled. I looked up at the clock.

"Okay come on." I stood up, holding out my hand. He gave me a bitch face but took my hand anyway.

"What?"

"We're going out for something to eat." I pulled him up. "And you're paying."

"Fine but I get to pick the place." He smirked.

"Fine by me."

Tag List: @iris-shihabi @cl0verbby @lilparcheesie @keigos-baby-bird @evilunicorns4minions

[juliansjss]

‘’ YOU ALWAYS COME TO THE PARTIES . . . ON YOUR KNEES ‘’ | Euronymous ! |

Warnings: NSFW, fem Reader, degrading talk, p in v, smut with plot, hate fuck, car sex. (No I do not support the actual person, just Rory playing a part.)

Authors note: hiiii! So this is my first post on this account, and my first time writing smut in forever, so if it’s a little iffy you know why! But I do hope you enjoy this!

————-

He had always been in his weird ways. His strange comments, and odd behavior. It turned you away from him even then. School was hell because of him. Always making strange comments about you, and your friends. So you felt the need to hold back.

Now, you have your own band. It was more in the goth scene than metal, but somehow the two of you ended up at the same party. You and your bandmate, Raven, had been dragged there by her old college roommate. The party was okay, though it stunk of weed and sex, that was normal for this kind of thing. You sat on the couch that someone had definitely been fucked on earlier, but honestly you didn’t you care. There was a random blunt being passed around and you weren’t too much of a prude to take it.

That was until you noticed the band walked in. You rolled your eyes as you still took a hit of the blunt. Honestly, the band made decent music, wasn’t your cup of tea but it wasn’t the worst you had heard.

You handed the blunt to the next person, leaning your head back as you felt the couch dip beside you, turning your head to the side to see exactly who it was.

‘Of fucking course.’ You thought as the dark haired male made his way to meet your eyes.

“Funny seeing you here, Yvette.” He said, dragging the stage name out, like it was a kind of joke with a flicker of a smirk on his lips.

“Yeah I bet it is, Euronymous.” You said in the same cocky tone that he had.

“You know, I never thought someone as stuck up as you would be into this kind of stuff.” He said, the banter seemingly amusing to the man.

“Well, I wouldn’t see someone as weird as you being invited to this stuff either” you said, deadpanning.

“Aw, don’t flatter me.” He said with a smirk on his lips.

You just turned away from the man as you got the blunt back, taking yet another hit,

“You know how to take your weed, huh?” He said, the same stupid smirk on his lips.

“I’m a musician, I know how to take more than just weed” you said, rolling your eyes “don’t you have some groupie to fuck??”

“I don’t fuck groupies. I’m the leader of the band.” He shrugged, his tone turning serious.

“Sure you don’t. Believe me if everytime I heard that I’d be drowning in money.” You said with a cocky tone, the spiel getting boring at this point.

“Oh yeah? And I bet you have a lot of experience with that. Huh?” He said, now taking the blunt.

“You’re a fucking loser, Øystein.” You said, standing up and walking away, back to find Raven.

The night had calmed down, since you had been up. People were either passed out, or outside in the pool. That’s where you found Raven, laid out on a lawn chair. You stood beside her. The girl supported a drink in her hand, and a cigarette hanging out of her mouth like a true rockstar.

“I think you got a ghost” she giggled, clearly drunk.

“Hm?” You said turning your head back, and there he was again.

God, he was relentless, but you would be lying if you said it wasn’t at least a little hot, that he was a little hot.

“Do you have a ride home?” You mumbled to your friend

“Yup! Jades taking me home, I’m all set, you know.. if you wanna.” She said winking at you.

“Ew god no.” You shook your head, with a sour expression on your face

“Aww you don’t wanna fuck me? That’s too bad. I would assume it would make a great collab for our bands.” He smirked as he looked down at Raven, who nodded back at him with a smile.

You rolled your eyes yet again, walking away from the scene. Except, before you could get very far, he grabbed your arm.

“No you don’t, I wasn’t done talking to you.” The man said, staring down into your eyes.

“What the fuck do you want?” You mumbled as he did so.

“I just wanna talk, sweetcheeks.” He said, clearly the nickname an unfunny joke.

“About fucking what, Øystein?” You said, slapping his hand off of you.

“About how I know you wanna fuck me, just as much as I want to fuck you.” He whispered in your ear, clearly trying to hide from prying eyes.

Maybe he wasn’t wrong. I mean, he was pretty hot. But that would be it. Mindless sex with a hot guy wasn’t the end of the world, was it?

“Will that make you shut up?” You said in an annoyed tone.

“Fuck yeah it will.” He said enthusiastically back.

You grabbed him by his arm and dragged him out to your car. That wasn’t what he expected, but you didn’t trust him not to make his weird ass bandmates come and do weird shit. You wouldn’t doubt if they would come and take pictures and show everyone. At least here, you knew the tint was dark enough that no one could see.

“Get the fuck in.” You said angrily. Honestly you probably needed to get the aggression out.

He got in the back seat, not being his usual mouthy self which filled you with a sense of pride. When you got in after him, he was already taking off his pants and boxers. His dick standing hard against his stomach.

“God you really are a whore.” You mumbled and rolled your eyes.

Honestly the reaction he gave you wasn’t what you expected, a shocked look but that was filled with arousal.

“And If you try to fucking kiss me,” you mumbled, before grabbing him by the hair “I’ll fucking cut your tongue off.”

“Damn.” He said, his voice mixed with lust.

“Damn is right.” You said, swallowing hard. As you began to unzip your black leather skirt.

Were you really about to do this? Fuck the guy that made your life a living hell before? Yeah. You only live your life once right? Plus hopefully this would get him off your back, once and for all.

“You know, for such a loser, you do have a big cock.” You smirk, mostly to yourself, you were honestly surprised with the amount he hadn’t talked at all in this interaction.

“Thanks. I’ve been working on it for this moment.” He said, still a cocky smirk on his face.

“You’re a bitch.” You said, rolling your eyes as you took off your underwear.

“Gonna let me fuck now? I’ve been waiting.” He mumbled as he eyed you like a meal.

You rolled your eyes as you moved to slowly push yourself onto his dick. A decent stretch, you couldn’t lie, that was for certain. A little yelp came out as you did so.

“Oh, oh” he said, staring up at you with big eyes, clearly feeling the pleasure too.

At that it was, it was unreal. It was a mix of things that made it so good. The mix of fear that you’d get caught, the fact it was him, and the fact that you were wrapped so tightly around the man.

“Hm, I guess you’re good enough.” You said with a smirk, through breathy moans as you began lifting yourself up and down on the cock inside you.

“That’s so good, slut.” He said, grabbing at your hair to pull you down further on him.

“You’re the one who claims to be big and bad and is fucking someone in their car.” You said in a snarky tone.

“Do you ever shut the fuck up? Just take my cock and be quiet.” He said as he began thrusting into you now.

“That would mean I lost.” You mumbled as the feeling began to overwhelm your senses.

God, he did have experience and you knew that. He knew what to touch and where to hit to get you screaming out in no time.

“Fuck.you are a good fuck, maybe I should’ve tried to get off my back sooner.” You mumbled as you threw your arms over his shoulder, gripping at his back, your nails making indents into the skin.

He continued thrusting into you for a while, before moving down to flip you over. Now hitting deeper than before in missionary, faster too. You cover your mouth quickly in fear of someone coming out to find you being fucked practically into the backseat of your car.

“Øystein.. if you fucking cum in me, I’ll chop your dick off.” You said, mumbled from under your hand.

“You’re great at dirty talk.” He laughed as he began fucking into you faster, clearly trying to get to the edge faster, as you knew the two of you have been in there far too long to not be suspicious.

He moved his hand down to rub at your clit, making you moan louder against the hand that was covering your mouth.

And then suddenly you saw white. You heard yourself moan louder than you had all night, and your back was arched against him.

It took a few seconds to come back to it. But when you did, you saw the cum on your stomach and Euro outside of the car, zipping up his pants as he watched you.

“You know where to call me if you ever want me on your back again.” He winked and walked away, shutting the door behind him.

[thebubblesareevil]

A Deal is a Deal…

I haven’t really posted any danny/kaldur in a bit so here you go

Danny was having a really long, really stupid day.

First he was late for his exam because he woke up to kitty and johnny fighting in his apartment. By the time he got that sorted out he had to rush to campus.

Then, by some miracle, the proctor let him in despite being late only to realize he was in the wrong exam halfway through. (He decided to finish the test and turn it in rather than admit his mistake.)

Then he finally managed to stop and get a truly unholy cup of coffee that he topped off with his last bit of ecto shot only for someone to run into him, spilling his coffee.

Which really didn’t make the blind date Sam set him up with anywhere near bearable. She was nice, don’t get him wrong, however Sam has two types of friends outside of Tucker and him. He was pretty sure he would have preferred hearing about the deforestation of the Amazon than have the heavily pierced girl get wayyy too excited when she realized he was from Amity Park. After he finally escaped with the excuse of feeding his dog Sam decided to call to find out how the date went.

“She did the thing Sam.” He stated bluntly as he struggled to unlock his door.

“And which thing would that be Danny? The one where she’s interested in your personality or the thing where you might need a restraining order?” He groaned, thumping his head on the door before checking the hall for neighbors. With the coast clear he phased through, once more leaving his arch nemesis to fight another day.

“The second one, or at least that definitely seemed where it was heading. She kept asking about all my favorite cemeteries back home.” He threw his keys on the counter, dropping his bag to the floor.

“Well did you tell her about the one near the old clocktower? I’m sure she loved that.”

“Sam, she wasn’t asking about nightly walks and talking to ghosts. She made some not so subtle hints about what she liked to do there.” He could hear Sam wince through the phone.

“Eww, sorry Danny. She really seemed like someone you would click with.” He sighed as he looked through the bare cabinets.

“Not your fault, to be fair things were going great till that point. Plus most people don’t see half as much as I do in graveyards. It could have been worse.” He grinned.

“Oh yeah, what are you thinking?”

“Do you remember that guy from the protest you set me up with awhile back?”

“You mean Orion? What about him? You said he tried to gas light you.” Sam almost sounded offended on behalf of her semi-cannibalistic friend.

“Oh he did more than that. He followed me home.”

“No!”

“Yep, apparently I was being stingy and he thought I owed him so he tried to steal my bike.” He laughed.

“Ugh, don’t worry I’ll be sure to pass the word on to his new partner Marcy. I guarantee he’ll regret it.” He shrugged as he ate a piece of plain bread.

“It’s whatever, at least he didn’t try to kill me.” Sam sighed.

“It was one time!”

“Oh really?” He said as he munched. “If I remember correctly it happened twice.” He could hear the sound of Sam smacking her forehead.

“The first time doesn’t count, that was an accident! Besides Valerie tried way more than I did.” She huffed.

“Yeah, I know.” He yawned, heading over to the bathroom, discarding his socks and shoes along the way. “Some how neither of you are even my worst exes to date.” Sam snorted.

“No I think that title belongs to that crazy Viking that was convinced you were going to start Ragnarok.” Danny felt a small tug at his core as he brushed his teeth.

“What can I say? She was charismatic!” He claimed after spitting into the sink.

“Yeah well Miss. Charismatic nearly talked you into a war with her brother just because he flirted with you.” The tug on his core got stronger. “Personally I would have gone with the brother.” Danny nodded as he nearly tripped walking to his bed.

“I mean, that was never in question. Regardless, I’m swearing off Vikings for the next century.” Danny began struggling to take his shirt off without setting down the phone. The tug on his core was stronger than ever, try as he might to ignore it.

“You really suck at this dating thing, I killed you twice and somehow I’m still not in your top ten-” Danny struggled to escape his stupid shirt as his core PULLED, sending him tumbling to the ground. With a groan Danny finally gave in and just pulled the stupid shirt through his body only to come face to face to someone that was distinctly NOT his bed.

He looked around,coming face to face to someone he was actively avoiding.

“Ello Phantom? How’s death going for ye.”

John Constantine, accompanied by what appeared to be some of the newer members of the Justice League.

Danny decided the best option for this would be to do his best impression of a confused, semi-hungover college student.

“Look man, I don’t know who you are, or what you want but do you have some coffee or something? I’m dying over here.”

“Yet not foolin anyone mate. Need a favor from you. Or rather your better half of you don’t mind.” John replied vaguely as he rubbed his hands together before blowing some kind of powder all over Danny.

Danny stood there flabbergasted, as a rain of dust? Covered him head to toe. He stood there for a minute before his face started to twitch as John began to chant a spell. Danny took a deep breath and-

“AACCHHOOO” John jumped back as the sneeze disrupted the dust.

“What the hell man?” He scolds as he rubbed his nose. John grunted.

“Stubborn little shit huh? Too bad we need the Phantom and he’s coming out one way or another.” Once more he began to chant, Danny however chose to ignore this fact as he took in the faces surrounding the circle. They were clearly some of the younger heroes, even a few apprentices by the looks of it. But Danny really didn’t have time for this, he had another exam tomorrow.

“Look man, I’m not sure what you’ve been smokin or how I got here but unless you’re gonna help me study for my engineering exam, then I gotta go.”

“Please wait.” Danny spun around to face the hero standing behind him, stopping him before he even started to leave. The handsome hero stood tall, clearly he was the leader of this group, which begged the question of-

“Why? What you guys possibly want from me?”

“Allow me to explain. I am Kaldur’ahm, though I am also known as Aquaman. We are seeking the help of a spirit of hope and protection that goes by the name of Phantom. We need his help.” Danny gave the gilled hero a considering look.

“With what?” Kaldur’ahm somehow managed to stand up even straighter.

“A powerful magician by the name of Zatanna was pulled into the Infinite Realms. We need to help of Phantom so we can venture into the realms to retrieve her.” He replied with a barely noticeable sense of urgency. Danny raised a brow.

“You want to go to another dimension? With help from a ghost named Phantom? And you want my help to what? Summon him?” John scoffed, completely ignoring the glare Aquaman sent his way.

“Don’t go playin dumb mate. How exactly do you think you got here.” He pointed to the floor “ That there is a summoning circle, invoking Phantom by name. Now here’s how I figure it. Either you’ve gone and disguised yourself or you decided to take this poor sod for a joy ride.” He smirked. “So which one is it mate?” Danny glared at the Englishman.

“Whether you’re Phantom or not we need help.” Danny sighed as he looked back at the hero.

“Well what’s in it for me? You dragged me from my apartment and you want my help, give me a reason.” He announced.

“Name your price demon.” Danny rolled his eyes at the annoying sorcerer.

“Not a demon.” He paused, trying to figure out what he could ask for as the little heroes started to get nervous. He was gonna help them one way or another, ideally they would give up on him and send him back to his apartment. It would be easy enough to get a magician out of the realms. Danny took one more look around the circle before grinning.

“How about a date?” He said, looking directly at Kaldur’ahm with a grin. He laughed before he continued “Just Kidd-”

“Deal.” Danny choked on his own spit as his cheeks lit up like a Christmas tree. John shouting from the other side of the circle.

“What the bloody hell kind of request was that?!?”

“ I didn’t think he’d say yes!!!!” Danny covered his cheeks as the handsome hero smiled at him.

“A small sacrifice to help a friend, though not a difficult one.” Danny’s face turned a darker shade of red as green started to bleed into his cheeks. ‘Was this guy seriously flirting with him right now?!?’ The hero raised a single smug brow at him, tilting his head just slightly to the side.

“Do we have a deal?” Danny took a deep breath, coughing into his hand.

“Uh, yeah sure, I’ll get your friend back from the realms.” Kaldur’ahm smiled, Danny blushed. “I guess I’ll just… yeah.”

“We shall begin preparations immediately. Once Phantom arrives we should head out immediately, the less time Zatanna spends in the realms the better.” His face closing off as he got serious, Danny couldn’t deny it was cute before he realized what he said.

“Oh, yeah no, you guys aren’t going.” John practically growled causing the hairy green kid to back up.

“Like hell we aren’t! Just because you claim to be a spirit of protection doesn’t mean I trust ye.” Danny turned a steely glare on the sorcerer as he walked towards him. He made it all the way to the edge and the look of confidence he’d been sporting during this whole ordeal dropped from his face as Danny stepped over the edge of the circle.

“I don’t give two shits if you trust me! You aren’t welcome in the Realms John Constantine. Not until you get that piece of patchwork you call a soul sorted out!” He looked around at the rest of the people in the room. “Besides, it’s against the rules to bring the living into the Realms and I’d rather not have to deal with Walker today, thank you very much.” John glared.

“Look here you dead piece of sh-”

“HALF-dead thank you.” He interrupted as he started to float off the ground. “Now buzz off before I change my mind.” John looked as though he intended to reply when Kaldur’ahm stopped him.

“Enough Constantine, we need his help. For Zatanna.” The British asshole grumbled to himself as he scurried off to the side. Danny stepped back on the ground, making his way over to the Atlantean.

“Hey Kaldur’ahm, before I get your friend, you don’t actually have to go on a date with me.” He looked away as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I was gonna help you anyway, I just wanted to get under Johnny boy’s skin.” He just looked at Danny with a smile.

“I thank you, however a deal is a deal, it’s too late to back out now.” Danny’s jaw dropped as the Atlantean grinned. “And please, call me Kaldur.” Danny coughed into his hand to try to force himself to talk.

“Okay… well… okay then… um…” he studdered, dying a little more inside. “I’m gonna go get your friend we can…uh… talk about the details after.” Kaldur nodded as Danny reached a hand behind him to open a portal.

“Agreed, and please be careful Phantom.” Danny paused.

“You can, you can call me Danny.” He back with a slight stutter.

“Very well Danny.” He smiled. Danny blushes as he backed up into the portal, tripping over his own two feet as he fell through. Once on the other side he quickly reached out to find the intruder in his domain. She was easy enough to find, he didn’t even bother transforming. She was standing on an unclaimed floating island only a few miles from where he opened the portal.

Armed with the knowledge that she regularly worked with superheroes he thought it would be best to announce his presence before he surprised her.

“You wouldn’t happen to be a magician by the name of Zatanna would you?” The fierce woman turned, her wand posed, ready to send a flurry of spells at a moments notice.

“And if I am?” Danny smiled.

“A friend of yours asked me to come get you.” She looked at him suspiciously.

“And which friend would that be?”

“A cute Atlantian with a killer sense of humor, named Kaldur.” She raised an eyebrow at that.

“I’ve never heard him described as having a sense of humor.” Danny chuckled.

“Yeah, I told him I’d come get you in exchange for a date. He didn’t even hesitate. Like he’d actually wanna go on a date with a ghost!” He replied with a laugh. Zatanna however did not join in and instead looked Danny up and down before looking him dead in the eyes. She grinned.

“Gotta say I can’t exactly blame him. It’s not often he gets asked out by handsome shirtless men.” Danny squinted at her confused before looking down. His eyes went wide as he realized he hadn’t been wearing a shirt the whole time!

[schvmacher47]

venus | oscar piastri

oscar piastri x fem oc

chapter 1 | quick pause in conversation word count: 4044

<– preview. –> next part.

let me know in the comments, if you want to be tagged in future parts :)

» [canyon moon - harry styles] « 1:54 ────〇──3:09 ⇄ ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ ↻

   »The egg challenge?« Oscar asked, raising an eyebrow as he eyed the kitchen as if he was preparing for his personal downfall. He didn't look too impressed, if anything, he probably wanted to get out of here as quickly as possible. As always. If there was one thing about Oscar I learned immediately, it was the fact that he wasn't too keen on any media activities. Truth or dare? He's gonna shoot you death glares all the time. Wet head? He's gonna complain about not knowing anything about his teammate. The only challenge he showed proper interest in, was the food challenge... Only because he didn't have to try the food himself and was the one enjoying all the chaos.

   »Yes, the egg challenge!«, I said enthusiastically. It was one of my many mastermind ideas, letting two young men, who most definitely were one of the worst cooks in the world, compete in a cooking challenge.    »You know I can't cook... It's gonna be embarrassing.«, he whined.    »Everyone knows you can't cook, especially after your tweets. Knowing you use your oven as a dryer just proves that point even more.«, I grinned as I set up the camera. This was going to be great. I was sure I was gonna be entertained.    »How? It was an emergency! You can't possibly bring that up all the time...«, Oscar protested. I knew it was an emergency, he made sure everyone knew that. But teasing him and getting on his nerves was simply too easy and fun to not do it.    »That's what they all say...«

   »Yeah that's what they all say, Oscar.«, Robert grinned, putting on his apron.    »Oh shut up mate.«, Oscar grumbled. »As if you're that good of a cook.«    »Definitely better than you!«    »This is not a competition, you know?«, I chuckled. »How about you also gear up, hm?«, I handed Oscar the remaining apron and chef hat. He just grumbled something unintelligible, still not too keen on my idea.    »Can you just for once be more motivated when I come up with such a genius idea? Pretty please?«, I sighed. This was definitely not what I signed up for when I applied for this job. I definitely underestimated working with teenagers and young adults and I definitely didn't imagine the young adults to be more stubborn and childish than the teenagers.    »What do I get in return?«    »A kiss!«, Robert exclaimed, but was soon silenced by both my and Oscar's death glares. Somehow everyone at Prema had made it their mission to tease Oscar and me all the time. For no reason. Arthur was the one who started it, claiming there was some sort of 'tension' and everyone just picked up on it.    »Whoa I was just joking, no need to stare me down like that.«    »You can have a cheat day and choose what we'll get, apart from Pizza Hawaii.«, I argued, bribing him into appreciating my idea.    »That's actually a great idea, but can we get this over with now?«    »Sure, ready when you are.«

   »We were told this is not a competition, but it definitely is a competition.«, Oscar said, glaring into the camera. »We have a bunch of eggs and three different ways to prepare them. A soft boiled egg, fried eggs, but over easy and a poached egg.«, he continued.    »We're both terrible at cooking, so let's see how it goes.«, Robert said, clapping his hands. »But, if I win this challenge, then I don't have to drive Oscar to the airport later today.«    »So you're saying that I have to drive when you win?«, I asked, raising an eyebrow, but Robert just grinned mischievously and nodded. I knew he was doing it on purpose.    »Exactly!«    »Deal! But you better win this Oscar, I still have to go grocery shopping, my fridge is the definition of empty and I definitely don't have the time to drive to the airport and back again.«    »I'll try... You shouldn't have too high hopes tho.«

   »You never showed us a video.«, Oscar grumbled as he put his pot on the hob.    »Why should I? You should know how to boil an egg...«, I shook my head in disbelief, he surely must've boiled an egg before.    »I've never boiled an egg...«, Oscar mumbled, a dumbfounded expression resting on his face. »But surely you wait until the water is boiling... It's a boiled egg, not a lukewarm egg that then boils.«    »You genius..«, I grinned. Robert and I exchanged glances, as we waited for the water to boil. I was just waiting for the disaster to unfold, waiting for my personal entertainment which was honestly the best part of my job. Apart from getting to travel the world and watch fast cars all weekend long of course.

   »My water is boiling, so...«, Oscar said, jokingly giving his egg a featherlight kiss for good luck, before not so gently putting it into the boiling water. Robert eyed him sceptically, before following and also putting an egg into his pot with boiling water.    »That's a very aggressive boil..«, Oscar mumbled, eyeing his pot and immediately turning the temperature down.

   »I think I cracked it.« A sigh escaped Robert's lips as he inspected the broken egg shell, before both he and Oscar started to chuckle.    »You did!«, Oscar laughed out loud. »So I win the boil challenge by default.«    »No you don't, I can try again!«, Robert argued, immediately putting another egg into the boiling water. Oscar just shook his head, but was soon also stressing, when he had another look into his pot.    »Oh no, mine's cracked too!«    »Yes!! The competition is back on!«, Robert happily exclaimed, both of them yet again erupting in a fit of laughter. »Oh shit, I didn't turn my timer back on.«, Oscar nearly dropped the second egg at Robert's words, not able to hold back his laughter. This time, he used a spoon to gently drop the egg into the water.    »Masterchef – Oh shit my timer!«, he exclaimed, rushing to set his timer for exactly three minutes. I grinned watching them both behind the camera, as I enjoyed the chaos unfolding in front of me.

   »Well let's go for a visual inspection first, Robert's is cracked, mine's not.«, Oscar said, pointing to the visible crack in Robert's egg. He managed to crack both of his attempts, but was still sure of victory.    »But that's not what you eat, it's important what's on the inside, not on the outside... Never judge a book by its cover!«, Robert exclaimed. »That's the philosophy of Robert Shwartzman.«    »Yeah, right«, Oscar grinned and shook his head as he started cracking his soft boiled egg. »Yeah nah, it's not looking good«, he stated after a first inspection. Robert's attempt didn't look too promising either, but it was the tiniest bit more solid.

   »And that is a win for me!«, Robert exclaimed, satisfied with his winning soft boiled egg.    »Well, if you want a half raw egg, I'm the man to call... Turns out these timers suck.«    »You have never ever sounded that Australian before«, Robert grinned. »Turns out these timers suck«, he mocked Oscar.    »Of course I sound Australian. I am Australian, you idiot!« Oscar rolled his eyes, as he cleaned up his workspace for the next challenge.    »Yeah I know, you just never sound that Australian«, Robert said, following Oscar's lead and also starting to clean up.    »If I would speak in an Aussie accent, there's no way that I would be getting my points across, because you lot wouldn't understand me!«    »Uh-uh, don't you dare speak for me, I'm pretty sure I could still understand you.« I actually wouldn't mind it if he spoke in his Aussie accent more often. But that was just my personal opinion.    »Sure, multilingual queen«, Oscar grinned, making fun of me and my list of many talents. I just rolled my eyes in response and refrained from making further comments on Oscar's lack of foreign language skills.    »Whatever you say, but let's get back to business...«, I mumbled, subtly reminding Robert and Oscar what their actual task was.

   »Well, guess who won the first round?«, Robert grinned, as he reminded Oscar of his first loss of the day. »This egg was broken, it was ugly, no one believed in it, but in the end it was the best!«, he added, making both Oscar and me erupt into a fit of laughter. I quickly wiped away the tears that were forming in my eyes, as Oscar composed himself again and cleared his throat.    »Okay, next up, we have the poached egg. This is probably my best bet of winning anything here today, so let's see how this goes...«, Oscar said, introducing the next part of the challenge. I didn't believe a single word that just left his mouth. The poached egg as his best bet? He couldn't be serious right now. Not after failing to boil a soft boiled egg.

   »I think it's a bit too hot, who put it on 9?«, Robert asked, as he put a tablespoon of vinegar into his pot filled with water.    »I did!«, Oscar said, minding his own business as he cracked open his egg.    »Cheating bastard. He's cheating!«, Robert exclaimed, probably hoping for me to disqualify Oscar from the competition, which technically wasn't even a competition. But he wasn't getting any sort of reaction from me, so he just started swirling his water and carefully letting his egg slip into the swirl.

   »Alright... I don't think that was too bad«, he said, after inspecting his first attempt for a while.    »Like you said, it was ugly before and turned out good... This one's... Ugly now, but probably going to turn out good.«, Oscar said, grinning as he had a look in Robert's pot.    »No wait, I wanna take it out and try again!«, Robert exclaimed and immediately grabbed a spoon and took out the egg.    »Wow, wow, wow, what happened to the hope, huh? Always have hope!«    »Yeah of course, I have hope! I am doing another one that's going to be even better!«    »If you say so...«, Oscar mumbled sceptically, but then also started with his first attempt. »So, no swirling, no vinegar, no salt, no nothing. Let's just hope and pray for the best«, Oscar said as he gently let the raw egg slip into the hot water. He proceeded to lean over the hob, his eyes never leaving the pot, to inspect his attempted poached egg. Emphasis on attempted.

   »Yeah, it's not going great...«, he mumbled, which also brought Robert's attention to Oscar's side of the kitchenette. »It's not the prettiest poached egg I've ever made, it's quite similar to Robert's to be honest, but...«, he added quietly.    »What the fuck!«, Robert said, a shocked expression taking over his face as he had a look into Oscar's pot.    »Aye, we're family friendly!«, I chuckled, taking a mental note to beep Robert's bad word later on.    »Have hope, Robert. Have hope!«    »It's up to you, man. But that doesn't look edible.« A disgusted expression was resting on Robert's face as he was eyeing the mishap. He just shook his head in mere disbelief.

   »And here I was thinking I was gonna get some lunch out of this...«, I interjected and earned a laugh from Robert. He just gave me a look that I interpreted as 'That's most definitely not going to happen'.    »No no, it's fine... This was my practice round, so no need to worry at all«, Oscar said and still seemed to be very hopeful as he took out the egg and prepared the second one.    »Maybe it wasn't boiling enough... Maybe I just have no talent... I think this might be the biggest issue here«, Oscar mumbled. His body language was very much giving signs of early defeat, as if he'd already accepted his fate, when Robert went and whispered something into his ear. I couldn't quite make out what Robert said, but I was pretty sure it was something along the lines of 'You're so doing this on purpose, I know you're not that bad...'.    »There's microphones on!«, Oscar exclaimed and looked straight into the camera, or more like behind the camera, to see if anyone of us heard what was being said.    »They're not listening«, Robert reassured him and grinned knowingly. Sure, nobody was listening...

   »So let's try this again«, Oscar said. »I'm sticking to the 'no swirling' technique«, he added and immediately put the second raw egg into the boiling water.    »This one's even worse!« He sounded very disappointed, especially as he watched Robert attempt and then succeed the challenge with his second try.    »That one's actually pretty good!«, Oscar exclaimed, as he inspected Robert's attempt. Robert started celebrating, being very sure of his second victory in a row. »He actually did a good job on that...«

   »Did I split the yolk? Maybe... Is that a problem? No...«, Oscar mumbled with a wry grin on his lips, as he took out his mishap of a poached egg. Both he and Robert erupted into a fit of a full body laughter, as they inspected the poached egg. »And to think this was my best bet–«, Oscar laughed, as he presented his rock solid poached egg to the camera. I chuckled, innerly thanking God for choosing to make Oscar a racing driver and not a cook.    »I bet Kaia is very impressed by your cooking skills!«, Robert said, laughing.    »Oh I sure am!«, I grinned and also started laughing. Their laughter was simply too infectious to not join in.

   Robert's egg was the definition of a perfect poached egg, the yolk was still runny, when he cut the egg open. Both he and Oscar went to try the poached egg and were visibly impressed by how good it was.    »You seriously have to try it!«, Robert said and waved me over to the kitchenette.    »Are you sure you don't want to poison me?«, I joked, but still got up and left my spot behind the camera, to take the fork loaded with bits of the egg, which Oscar held out to me.    »Poison you? I don't think we're that bad...«    »That's why your egg is rock solid... but sure, you're not that bad«, I grinned, as I finally took the fork from Oscar, our fingers brushing as he passed it to me. I inspected the egg one last time, for safety reasons, before I got over myself and gave it a try.    »Yeah, Robert definitely wins this round... Without a doubt, which also means I get the honour of driving you to the airport...«, I grumbled, giving Oscar my best death glare, to which he only raised his hands in surrender, as if he were rejecting all blame. »Just to warn you now, I get to choose the songs we're going to listen to. Capito? My car, my rules«, I playfully said.    »Yeah, whatever, as long as I'm getting to the airport, that's fine with me...«

   Oscar did end up winning the fried egg, but over easy challenge, but it didn't change a thing about Robert's overall win. As soon as the cameras were off, Robert put on that mischievous grin again.    »Well, I guess you'll be having the honour of driving Mr. I don't get rental cars to the airport. Please do my car rides justice and don't be too nice«, he said, a big grin playing on his lips.    »I'll make sure he'll still get the Robert experience,« I chuckled, as I started packing up the camera equipment.    »I know that's not gonna happen because you're most definitely not as reckless of a driver as Robert. So that's a relief for me because I for once won't be carsick.«, Oscar said, getting rid of his apron and chef hat.    »On the expense of my dinner, thank you very much«, I joked.    »Now you're making me feel bad...«, he mumbled as he helped me clean up the kitchen.    »If I remember correctly you're the one who lost the challenge, so I think that's deserved.«    »Evil!«

***

   »Do you have everything?«, I asked Oscar as I grabbed my bag and car keys.    »Yes!«    »Are you sure?, I asked again, making sure we wouldn't have to turn around. I remembered all the countless times Robert had to turn around because Oscar forgot something. At this point, the only important thing he didn't manage to leave behind was his phone. I hoped I didn't just jinx it... If his head wasn't permanently attached to his body, there would've been a great chance of him losing it somewhere around the world.    »Yes«, he confirmed as he pushed his suitcase to the main entrance. I quickly grabbed a water bottle from the mini fridge before I followed him to the main hall. Oscar had already brought his luggage outside and was waiting for me to unlock the car.

   As I stepped outside, the crisp evening air sent shivers down my spine. The sky was painted in beautiful hues of oranges and pinks, as the sun began its descent. I unlocked the car and opened the trunk for Oscar to put his, multiple weeks worth, of luggage into it.    »Buckle up, you're in for the ride of your life!«, I told him as I got into the driver's seat. I connected my phone to the car's bluetooth and chose a playlist as Oscar also got into the car. The first notes of 'Red' by Taylor Swift sounded softly from the sound system as I pulled out of the car park. Loving him was like driving a new maserati down a dead-end street.    »As long as we don't end up in a dead-end street, that's fine with me«, Oscar said, a knowing smile resting on his lips as he made himself comfortable. It took a minute for my brain to process the ambiguity of his words. He for sure knew how to use his words, how to send my brain cells into a frenzy. Still waters could run deep. Very deep.    »Are you questioning my abilities right now?«,    »I would never!«    »You better not, since you're relying on my abilities right now...«, I said, grinning as I drove onto the carriageway.    »I promise I won't complain«, he said. »This is definitely an upgrade, came here thinking I was going to have to deal with Robert's horrendous driving, but got an unexpected upgrade to first class.«    »As if you didn't lose on purpose to get this upgrade, let's be honest.«, I stated, quickly glancing over to him. He shook his head, but had a knowing grin on his lips. He of course did it on purpose.    »I would never!«, he repeated his statement from before.    »Yeah, as if I'd believe you... Just say it, you enjoy my company.«    »I thought that was obvious...«    »No shit Sherlock, it was obvious from the moment where you all of the sudden forgot how to boil an egg to get me to drive you to the airport«, I joked.    »So where's the problem?«    »I don't know, you tell me?«, I asked, grinning.

   There was a quick pause in conversation, we fell into a comfortable silence, as I focused on the traffic ahead and Oscar was doing God knows what. Probably just staring out of the window for most of the time.    At some point, I turned the music up. I felt the need to fill the void with some background noise. A few songs in, which I classified as my 'warm up', I started humming along to One Direction's 'No Control'. Out of the corner of my eye I caught Oscar glancing over at me. A grin spread across my lips. Oh, he had no idea of what he was going to witness. I wiggled in my seat, as I started to sing along to the last lines of the first verse. The One Direction carpool karaoke video was my roman empire, the choreography to No Control was engraved into every single one of my brain cells and every time that song popped up in my playlist, I couldn't help but dance along.    Oscar chuckled softly next to me, shaking his head in amusement as I belted out the lyrics. Once the chorus hit, the last bit of self-control left my body and my hands left the steering wheel to do the choreo justice. I was challenging my inner Harry Styles. I literally had no control.

   »First of all, I would very much appreciate it, if you would keep your hands on the steering wheel and focus on the street ahead...«, Oscar mumbled, a terrified expression resting on his facial features as he watched my impromptu performance. »Secondly, I sometimes wonder if your mother tongue really is English or you're just fucking with me...«    »Why?«, I asked, once the chorus was over.    »The way you sing these songs with so much confidence really has me questioning if you know what you're singing about«, Oscar chuckled. I raised an eyebrow. He thought this was bad? I made a mental note to introduce him to Zara Larsson's music in the future.    »This isn't even the worst one...«, I said, grinning as I continued to bob my head to the beat.    »There's worse?« I just nodded in amusement and watched him shake his head.

   »Could you take the next exit please?«, Oscar asked, when we were halfway through our journey to the airport.    »Why, do you need to use the toilet?«    »Just do it, okay?«, he practically begged me as we approached the exit he was talking about. It was a service station area that even accommodated smaller versions of supermarkets. I sighed and moved over into the exit lane, slowing down as I reached the parking lot.    »I'll be quick«, Oscar said, as he got out of the car. He rushed over to one of the service points, but then disappeared behind a passing truck. As I waited for Oscar to come back, I decided to also open my door and stretch my legs out of the car. I reached for the water bottle that I'd placed behind my seat, and opened it to take a few refreshing sips.

   A few minutes later, I saw Oscar coming back. He was carrying a brown paper bag, seemingly from one of those supermarkets. I raised an eyebrow when he opened the door and flopped down on the passenger's seat.    »Why are you looking at me like that?«, he asked and fastened his seatbelt again.    »I thought you had to use the bathroom?«, I asked, tilting my head in confusion.    »I lied, my bladder is not that weak –«    »Funny coming from you, when you have to go to the toilet every time right before getting in your race car, but sure, go on«, I chuckled, earning a death glare from Oscar.    »If you'd let me finish, you'd know the reason why I lied«, he stated. »I felt bad, when you said you still had to go grocery shopping and since I am basically the reason for you not having a proper dinner tonight, I got you something...«, he mumbled and pointed to the brown paper bag. I blinked in surprise, caught off guard by his thoughtfulness.    »You did what?« Oscar didn't even acknowledge my question, instead he put the bag on his lap and reached into it.    »I got you dinner.«, he said, pulling out what looked like a big salad bowl, bread and a bar of chocolate. »Consider it a thank you for driving me to the airport.« I couldn't help but stare at him in disbelief.    »You didn't have to do that«, I mumbled. I was at a loss for words. »Thank you...«, I managed to say, my voice barely above a whisper. »I really appreciate it.«

***

author's note:

hiya everyone, i hope you enjoyed reading! this is just the beginning, and there's more chaos to explore in the next chapters. i'd love to hear about your thoughts and would like some feedback, so i could integrate some stuff into the upcoming chapters :D don't forget to vote and comment, your support is very much appreciated! lots of love xx

next up:  »2 | it feels like a perfect night« get ready for some birthday shenanigans!

read venus on wattpad:

[batsplat]

speaking of smallville now that was certainly a show. how many seasons did you manage and when is it best to stop? I am currently at s2 and already I would kill every other character for lex, wyd it’s only gonna get worse 😭

lmaooo okay so I got to. six. which actually kinda kills me because I swear I poured my heart and my soul into that stupid show, it drove me insane it left me a lesser person and I BARELY GOT HALFWAY

my basic analysis of the default journey with that show that I'm going to pretend is universal is like. it hooks you with something compelling in s1 and you still have enough naive faith to give it benefit of doubt that the writers actually know what they're doing, because you just wanted to have a bit of fun but, hey, these characters are actually more interesting than you expected!! then in s2 you're starting to get doubts but you're already kinda too deep. then s3 breaks your sanity and makes you scream and at this point you just see how far this shit goes. then s4 is.... mid..... but is also in a way the last remotely palpable season? and then at some point in s5 you're just like. wow I don't even enjoy the hate watching any more. and s6 is. yeah. eventually there was one storyline that is so insanely uncomfortable that it's just. enough. enough!

[mild spoilers to follow]

if s2 drives you insane on lex grounds then!! boy!! s3!! the thing about s3 from lex's pov is that. okay it's extremely angsty and does increasingly radicalise you... I have to say I started this show in a very innocent jokey 'oh ho ho I heard they have some good superman/lex luthor queerbait in that noughties show!!' and was ready to be a lex fan like. as a bit. and y'know my readiness to adopt morally dubious characters is pretty high anyway. but the first few seasons made me go?? okay but he genuinely isn't even the villain?? like I'm not even saying this for the bit, he LITERALLY is not the bad guy in this story?? guys??? and then by the end of season 3 I had been completely radicalised to the 'Actually Lex Luthor Should Turn Evil And Kill All Of You People And I Will Cheer Him On' stance. but what really, really, really kills me is that after all that, they still manage to bungle his transition to evil. like, they ignore all the very obvious reasons for why lex would turn evil after all that, and just come up with completely new ones? that have fuck all to do with this character you've been writing up to that point?

and the worst bit. the WORST bit. is that after all that, he literally does not even have fun being evil. like, you know that season one episode where he's being mind controlled and does his gay little swagger. this scene, yeah:

first of all, again, they ended up erasing lex's canonical motivation for turning evil, which is being so queer-coded he might as well be wearing a sign with slurs around his neck while he's stuck in a small town in fucking kansas. like "you think I don't see the way your parents look at me? the way half the town looks at me?" okay, great, love how this entire arc is eventually concluded by having the show say the entire town including clark's small-minded parents were 100% right to be suspicious of him, that there was something fundamentally defect with him basically from birth and he was always going to turn out to be evil. I feel like you definitely thought through the implications of what you wrote here!

but never mind all that, my actual point is that lex is having fun here!! this is one of several episodes where they're 'foreshadowing' lex turning evil by 'having a paranormal reason to make lex evil for a few minutes' (some subtle writing, this), and he's generally having a lot of fun with it!! he's leaning into the camp of it all!! he's freed from all his nasty and completely unnecessary inhibitions like 'not killing everyone in smallville' which. good. and he's just having a great time. and then he becomes a villain and he's literally just miserable all the time!! it sucks!! like omg if you're going to butcher his writing and ruin the character then at LEAST let him have some fucking fun?? at least let him experience joy at his own depravity or whatever? like he doesn't even get to do any fun villain monologues at clark, he's literally just sad clark isn't his friend any more while clark is giving him the homophobic dog slur. and then also about twice a season something paranormal happens to clark and he physically assaults lex to the point where he like, almost kills him, and then after that everyone pretends it didn't happen and clark never apologises and continues to burst into his room demanding answers. like omg?? lex, they hate you anyway, can you please just attempt to shoot clark?? also, obviously the turn to villainy should have been in large part motivated by lex finding out clark's secret and going?? the fuck is wrong with you for not just SAYING this?? (plus finding out everything clark did to lex in season three to keep his secret like it's genuinely so fucked up #lmao) but. I hate to break bad news to you about where we're at with the whole 'does lex know clark's secret yet' situation at the point where I gave up. genuinely what is the point of all this building and perfectly interesting character work if you're NEVER gonna deliver

but quite possibly an even worse sin of the later seasons that genuinely broke my brain was the treatment of lex's father. like, not to give the game away too much here, but the show's philosophical stance on rotten apples ends up being.... well. it's interesting which characters this show feels is worthy of redemption!! also interesting when they retcon several seasons of writing for the show that already very much set up why a character would actually perfectly legitimately go insane and instead settle for 'well his father sure did know there was always something wrong with him'!! watching some season 3 and season 5 episodes back to back would leave your face scarred from the amount of whiplash in the writing. the whole thing's kinda incompetent and dumb but is also like?? actively a little bit evil when you really think about the implications of what they're writing here

anyway. it's a brave stance on superman to go 'okay but what is being a superhero really about if not a whole whole lot of gaslighting'. and I do love the clark stalking room!! but the problem is, they could've played the clark/lex dynamic in a kinda tragic 'wow clark really has been so blinded by his parents that he's gonna end up destroying his relationship to lex because he just can't be honest with him and lex really needed one person in his corner who actually trusted him but clark wasn't the right person to provide that' way. they could've played it in a sort of fun 'yeah this is kinda fucked up and weird and toxic how they simply cannot stop doing dubious shit to each other' way where you just kinda roll with how terrible the whole thing is. but they don't go for either of those!! they're so stuck with treating clark's parents as the moral centre of the universe, with their "marriage is SACRED, clark" schtick and all that (yeah, there's an episode where clark gets lectured about the importance of the bond of marriage, this is a thing that happens) that they're blatantly unaware of what story they're telling but ALSO just refuse to lean into the batshit insane elements and just have!! fun!! and it's one of those things where you really do feel like an idiot for even thinking about this stupid fucking show so!! much!! but I swear, I swear they had a dynamic that hit like crazy in season one... also some of the fic out there for them is CRAZY like it kinda does make it all worth it but still!! still!! this shit infuriates me!!

anyway, here are some bonkers plot bits I remember happening in this show for you to enjoy if you continue in this endeavour:

the lex luthor slut shaming episode

clark kent slut shaming lex luthor, which is conceptually funny anyway but becomes funnier if you just read it as clark being unable to figure out he is actually just subliminally attracted to his friend. like, okay, clark being disappointed at lex for sleeping with thirteen different women, I see you

like. multiple lesbian lana moments. she's constantly getting herself in lesbian situations. and I get this is some kinda weird fanservice-y shit from the showrunners but, sue me, I thought lesbian vampire lana was cute

which is a thing that happens

they get spike from btvs to tell clark vampires aren't real, which is the one funny thing they wrote in about a season

the native american stuff is always deeply uncomfortable but it becomes even weirder when they invent some native american prophecy *deep sigh* to explain how lex was always evil

clark steals a car from lex several episodes after committing like, one of the most obscene acts of betrayal it is possible to commit against a friend (lex is unaware of this and possibly never finds out? I think the writers maybe forgot about this.) and lex is just like. it's fine <3 I know friends sometimes have to do crazy shit for other friends!! you're my friend, right?? and clark goes... yeah. sure

I vaguely remember lex buying stuff the american football high school team at some point and showing up to the lockers to give a speech and it's just?? this is right after the friendship break up and it's basically lex talking right at clark and he's talking about the importance of fresh starts and it is so fucking funny

the one episode where lana is in paris. they had built up to this for ages as like a whole thing where lana finally frees herself from that miserable town and all the people in it (don't ask how the 'lana knowing clark's secret' situation develops. it doesn't) and then she's there for. one episode

martha kent tells clark how they can't harbour illegal immigrants at one stage?? she eventually changes her mind I think but what even was that all about

the papa kent goes into politics arc. shoot me

lex becomes like. possessed by zod. which somehow manages to make everyone involved more dull

silver kryptonite makes clark paranoid, which ends up being pretty funny because he genuinely talks the exact same way

lex thinks clark can throw him across the room because he's been hypnotised

lex starts capturing various clark super powered friends and delivers these gay villain monologues to them (like genuinely, in one of them he's got shirtless aquaman strapped to a gurney and he's like, leaning over him, teasing him with a glass of water) and they're some of the best bits of the show

clark discovers the clark stalking room, which I will say was very funny

chloe basically saying lex always sends clark these massive gifts as a way of keeping his affections which?? clearly true but I thought we were keeping that the subtext

clark gatecrashes lex's wedding high on red kryptonite

one of lex's old bullies gets killed by like, a statue falling from the top of the building they're standing next to and stabbing the guy and then some of the blood splashes on lex and he's just like ?? bleh. fantastic scene

and THEN there's several scenes with his father where lex is like 'well that sure was a nice shirt :(' and lex's father is berating him for his lack of humanity. or something

there's an episode where lex is split into good lex and evil lex and it's genuinely the only worthwhile thing the show did that season. like the writing is still kinda incoherent but, crucially. it sure is fun

the spirit of lex's mum tells him she thinks he sucks

worst show in existence. I'll never forget it

[bluepeachstudios]

Oo rank the splinters from worst to best dad! I have my own personal ranking but i wanna hear yours

SPLINTER BEST DAD: Worst to Best

Last Ronin Splinter: Raised children to fight in a family blood feud! Didn't let them stop even when they claimed to be tired of fighting and killing! Got one of his sons killed by refusing to retreat! Horrible person and father!

Mirage Splinter: Raised the turtles to kill a man that HE had the beef with because Shredder killed HIS master, but he couldn't do it on his own so he just!!! RAISED CHILDREN AS SOLDIERS INSTEAD???? He's mostly "sensei" instead of "dad".

IDW Splinter: OOuuhhohoho. I could get into it. I won't. I get why he did some of the things he did. Plus he never really raised kids, they just kinda. Mutated into teengers. Bad dad though like jesus. Made more trouble for his kids than he helped.

Bayverse Splinter: He's just.... there.... he taught them how to fight... his guidance is kinda blah and he's pretty harsh with his punishments. You don't see him have any really soft moments with the kids, but he's not really a horrible dad, he's just... meh. Mid. I blame this on the bad writing of the movies.

1987 Splinter: He's a great caretaker, honestly. But he's more a sensei than a dad. He acts more like their teacher, he calls them "my friends" or "my pupils" and "my turtles" which is v cute. They definitely see him as their dad/master. He's very good to them, so he gets extra points. <3

2012 Splinter: OKAY I KNOW PEOPLE ARE GONNA BE MAD ABOUT THIS ONE. But he ALMOST NEVER fights beside them. You never see him doing anything fun with the kids. I'm sure he has! But like you never see it in the show, he tends to keep a distance. He keeps them safe from the blood fued, doesn't want them getting involved with Shredder. He does push them to save the world and does the whole "sacrifice anything or anyone to complete the mission" to Leo, a 15 year old boy, and then just sits at home???? Until April has to convince him to help?? AND HE DOESN'T HELP HIS SONS HE HELPS APRIL AND I'M??? Anyway that always bothered me. I love him as a character.

Rise Splinter: Here's our boy! He's shown with photos that he participated in fun activities with the kids when they were little. Not in the best way, obviously, but like!! He helped them make a lemonade stand!! Which is such a human child thing to do. He wanted them to have a normal life! He refused to train them for a long time with anything but movies because he didn't want them to have to fight. He's depressed as hell and yeah he's selfish at times but he has character growth through the series and turns into an honestly great dad by the end of it. I wish they'd had more time to show that growth and the aftermath of it.

1990 Splinter: THE LIVE ACTION DAD EVER. (I'm electing to ignore The Next Mutation. he's not even a dad. he's their sensei. anyway fuck next mutatio-) He's so gentle with them. He loves them so much. Calls them his sons all the time. Protects them despite being captured and interrogated and presumably tortured for information. HE LOVES THEM SO MUCH.

2003 Splinter: The Best Dad. He's a rat dad. He's not carrying a whole lot of human baggage. He lost his family once and he knows how to make one now. He takes care of his boys, he scolds them for going out, and when he realizes they're going to keep going topside and he can't stop them, he makes them do it safely. He is with them for ALL of their big fights. He EXCLUSIVELY calls them "my sons" constantly. He loves them so much oh my god. Would die for them in a heartbeat. Never wanted them involved with the Foot, tried DESPERATELY to keep them safe from it, and when he realized they were involved, he explained everything to them. He hugs them every time they get separated, he handles Leo's Depression Arc(tm) as well as he can. He never gets mad at Leo for hurting him. He just realizes that he can't help his son and must send him to someone else. And that's so hard to do.

So anyway 2k3 Splinter is best rat dad. Rats were made to be dads imo.